At Myrtle's Home, Sarah sits inside the living room, as she looks around her Mother's home, as the house is empty, and sighs "Ahh it's so peaceful, Mama and Mitzi are on their walk, and Regina's at work, and Ted's drowning in booze." Sarah pulls out her laptop, as she says to herself "Well my last test before the finals." The door opens, as Myrtle walks inside, as Mitzi shakes her head, as Sarah turns around, and asks her Mother "So how are you liking your new walking place." Myrtle sighs "I hate Parkway Mall, and Mitzi and I went instead to Quivira Park, and I got some news." Sarah turns towards her Mother, as Mitzi looks at Myrtle, as Sarah asks "And what would that be?" Myrtle says in a sad tone "Mitzi and I was walking Quivira Park this morning, and I seen they had a seat empty in the information booth, and I applied for the job. They need some help keeping those teenage floozies in check, so I offered my services." Mitzi adds "And it's across from the "W" word." Myrtle snarls "I won't look towards it." Mitzi goes "Myrtle, they anchor both sides of where you'll be. I think I want to make a bet. How long before you go bat-shit." Myrtle smiles "I've moved on." Sarah quips "Oh yes Mama. On your birthday Aunt Ira sent you a gift card for Willard's, and you burned it. Yeah Mama." Myrtle looks at Mitzi and Sarah, and quips "Well it'll be good for me. And I love helping people out. I miss working..." Mitzi looks at Sarah and tells her "I'm heading home, we all know where this is going." Mitzi sneaks out as Myrtle starts to ramble "I worked at Jones from downtown, to Overland, and then the bastards the next state over bought my beloved store, and fired me, and did away with my favorite place besides the Casino." Sarah reminds her Mother "I worked there too, but Mama are you sure you're able to work at what you called for years "The Enemy?" Myrtle shrugs "Oh yes Sarah. I have my temper under control." Sarah sarcastically responds "Sounds like Ted telling everyone he's a social drinker." Myrtle heads out on the front porch, as she laughs "Well I start tomorrow. I'm excited. A new adventure!" Sarah sighs "A disaster."
Night has arrived, as Regina and Ted sits in the kitchen, as Regina tells her Husband "So since Mama's working, I'm inviting my friends from work over for some drinks." Ted, drinking a beer slurs "Ahh? Well I'll invite mine too since the old bat you call a Mother will be working." Regina looks at her Husband, and smiles "She's old, and working will tire her. She won't care at all." Sarah walks out of the basement, as she looks at her Sister and Husband, and smiles mischievously "I was standing behind the door. Party time tomorrow?" Regina snaps "Yes! And we have a right to have company over here. Hell Mama will be too exhausted to worry, and I picked up brochures today." Sarah walks over to Regina, and whispers "I'll be here, and Mama will be home before all of you get well lit. But hey, she may not give a shit." Regina nods "Exactly Sarah. By the way do you want to look over these nursing home brochures?" Sarah asks in a snark "Finally admitting you've lost your mind and moving into one old woman?" Sarah shakes her head, as Regina looks at Ted, and goes "She's a bitch." Ted, buzzed, tells his Wife "So are you. Both of you take after that old bat." Sarah heads to her bedroom, and laughs "It's good you two are planning while Mama sleeps. Need a mirror?" Regina tells Ted "Let's go to bed." Ted slurs "Ok. But that's all. I'm tired." Regina rolls her eyes, as she responds "And that's supposed to be my job."
It's the next day, and at Quivira Park Mall, in Overland Park, Myrtle sits inside the information kiosk, in the center of the mall, as the Mall Manager tells Myrtle "Here's your directory, and remember, always a smile." Myrtle smiles at the Manager, as she responds "I know how this works. I used to work at Jones before you were thought of." The Manager walks away, as Myrtle looks down at a computer, and asks herself "Oh well, some entertainment." Myrtle logs onto a social media site, and begins to type in some names, as she quips "Time to check on the family." Meanwhile a woman walks over, and asks "Ma'am. Do you know when Willard's open?" Myrtle mumbles "Willards?" The woman asks Myrtle "You work information." Myrtle looks up, and responds "They closed." The woman looks behind Myrtle, and then turns, as she tells Myrtle "And it looks like you shouldn't be at this job you old woman." Myrtle yells "And I hope your purse strap breaks you slut!" Mitzi arrives, along with Alberta, as Alberta laughs "Did we just hear the Myrtle Thomas we all know come out of that information desk?" Myrtle snaps "Bitch just asked me about Willard's." Mitzi sighs to herself "Looks like I won the bet." Alberta tells Mitzi "Well they are having a nice sale. We should check it out." Myrtle yells "The hell you will!" Mitzi quips "By tomorrow we'll be walking together again." Myrtle asks in a snarky tone "Did the two of you come down here to test me?" Alberta looks at her friend, and tells Myrtle "Actually, Mitzi and I just ran into each other. She's walking, and I'm signing a lease for a spot for my salon's 3rd location." Myrtle points to a temporary wall, and smiles "There's one right next to Willard's." Alberta responds "That's the spot." Alberta and Mitzi walks away, as Myrtle sits at her desk, and watches the crowds enter the two Willard's, and Myrtle fumes, as she says to herself "You inbreed bastards took my Jones, now time for the payback." Myrtle gets over the telecom, with mischief in her eyes, as she calmly responds "Fire in Willard's! FIRE!" The crowds run out of the stores, as Myrtle smiles.
Meanwhile, as afternoon has come, at Myrtle's Home, Sarah returns with anger, as she says to herself "Amelia what am I going to do about you?" Sarah looks around the yard, as Zara sits on Alberta's porch, with a bottle of wine, yells "Them white folks need to turn that damn music off. Sounds like hell's playhouse. I've yelled, but they don't know what I'll do. I saw liquor." Sarah shakes her head, and snarls "Regina." Zara sighs in a slurred tone "That girl is as white as it gets. But you are one I like, and my Great-Granddaughter. You've done your best." Sarah tells Zara, looking towards Myrtle's Home "Thank you. I need to go crash this damn party. So things may be loud for awhile, but done." Zara puts on her sunglasses, as she rocks, and takes a drink of wine, as Sarah walks over, and notices two people on the porch, staring at Sarah, as she glares at them, and walks inside, as Sarah notices Regina's friends inside, with a beer keg, and Sarah looks for her Sister, who's in the kitchen, drunk, as is Ted, and Sarah yells, as she turns off the music, "Who in the hell are you?" Regina snaps "Damnit Sarah. Can't we have some time at the house we rent?" Sarah smiles "I think Mama would do a cartwheel down State Line Road if you moved far away!" Regina yells "I'm going nowhere!" Sarah looks towards the crowd, and snaps "Party over! All of you, except you Regina and Ted, will leave!" Regina yells "Don't listen to her!" Sarah glares, and walks through the house, and Regina's party ends, and Regina and Ted look at each other, as Sarah looks around the house, and responds "Let's relax. I know Mama's enjoying her job." Regina pulls out a beer, and asks Sarah "Oh family bonding?" Ted asks "Basement Sarah?" Sarah replies "No. I wouldn't worry, so just relax. Drink. I don't feel like having a party here." Regina looks at her Husband, and responds "She's really the oldest." Ted goes "Oh." Sarah reminds her Sister "Mama named you after the town Mama and Daddy conceived you." Regina walks into the den, and Sarah heads to the basement, as Regina tells Ted "She's just starting something. Plotting." Ted lays on the couch, as Regina looks around.
As the afternoon turns to evening, At Quivira Park Mall, Myrtle sits inside the Mall Manager's office, as he's angry, and asks Myrtle "What's your problem with that store? They own half of our mall." Myrtle gasps "Shit! You all took over my.. The enemy grows!" The Mall Manager looks at Myrtle, as he pulls out his hand, and Myrtle looks into her purse, and responds "I don't have any. But I will find myself another damn mall." Myrtle storms out, and drives home, angry, as she says to herself "And I lied." Back at Myrtle's Home, Sarah walks out of the basement, as she looks around, and Regina yells at her Sister, as Sarah walks into the den "Shouldn't we clean this mess up?" Sarah quips "Mama won't be worried about this party you threw. And since you pay rent, you're entitled to a party Regina. Don't worry about it. I'm going next door." Sarah walks outside, as Regina turns towards Ted, passed out on the couch drunk, and yells "Wake up Ted! She's being too damn nice." Ted slurs "Shut up. I have a headache." Sarah walks over to Alberta's as Alberta and Mitzi sits on the porch, as Sarah asks "Where's Zara?" Alberta points inside the house, and responds "She passed out. I saw a wine bottle out here when I returned from the mall." Sarah asks "How's Mama and her new job?" Mitzi quips "She yelled fire over the intercom when Willard's opened, and when we left, she was yelling at some teenagers, calling them little sluts." Sarah responds "Well I didn't mention ownership to her. If she knew Willard's was half owner, she'd flipped." Alberta sighs "Myrtle will never forgive that store I don't believe..." Suddenly, Myrtle's Buick flies into the driveway, as Sarah looks at Alberta and Mitzi, and Mitzi quips "Well that didn't last long." Mitzi follows Alberta inside, as Sarah walks towards her Mother, as she slams the car door, and sees beer cans, and asks Sarah "Well what in the hell was going on here?" Sarah tells her Mother "So I was informed what happened at the.." Myrtle yells "Screw Quivira Park! I'll never shop there again!" Sarah replies "You never have Mama." Myrtle smiles "And that's why I'm smart. Thank god you inherited my intelligence. Now who threw a party at my house?" Sarah puts her arm around her Mother, as she whispers "Regina did. She didn't think you'd care." Rage fills Myrtle's eyes, as she asks "Please tell me you saved me some hell to raise?" Sarah sighs "Look inside." Myrtle opens the door, and looks around, as she gasps "What in the hell.." Regina walks into the living room, and begins to plead forgiveness, as Myrtle yells "Shut up you wrinkled old slut! And clean this damn mess! NOW! MOVE IT! Standing up." Regina snarks to her Sister "You set me up!" Myrtle yells at Ted "Wake your impotent ass up and help your Wife!" Myrtle tells Sarah "Order the two of us pizza, while we watch these two clean this damn mess. At least this day will be enjoyable." Regina gripes to Ted, as Myrtle stands and watches, and yells "Shut up and clean! My damn house!" Regina and Ted starts to clean, as Myrtle watches with anger in her eyes, as she quips "I get fired, and my house gets destroyed by a twit and an idiot. A bad day all around!"
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
Life With Myrtle: Season One. Episode 10. Sarah's Nightmare
It's morning time at Myrtle's House, as Myrtle sits on the patio and drinks a cup of coffee, as Sarah walks outside, as she asks her Mother "You've been quiet this morning Mama?" Myrtle points towards the home behind her, and whispers "They just got done having sex in their pool." Sarah gasps "Mama. Are you spying on your neighbors?" Myrtle quips "They really are too damn ugly to look at. Jimmy and I stayed in the bedroom, or the kitchen table." Sarah sighs "Too much information this early in the morning Mama." Myrtle sighs "Ahh the joys of something I retired from when your Daddy died. Good thing I got a toy though." Sarah covers her face, as she blushes, as Myrtle whispers, as she keeps watching the neighbors behind her "He put on some clothes. Good I thought I was about to puke." Regina walks out, as she prepares to head to Pancake King, as she asks her Mother and Sister "What are the two of you watching?" Sarah responds to her Sister "Possible potent sex." Myrtle laughs "Remember that Regina? It looks like you're not the only horny bitch on the block now. We got two sex addicts behind us." Regina laughs "I watched them last night. I wish we had a pool." Myrtle sighs "And there's the reason why we don't have one." Meanwhile someone knocks at the door, as Ted answers from inside, and a yell's heard, as Alberta yells "Sarah! Sarah!" Alberta walks out onto the patio, as Regina rolls her eyes, and Myrtle and Sarah turns to Alberta, as Sarah asks "What is it?" Alberta asks "Watching the neighbors? Ward and I did the same thing. But that's not why I'm here." Regina quips to Alberta "You have always been a nosy person." Alberta asks Regina "Wouldn't you like to play with your Husband? I see slut in your eyes." Regina yells "I have to work!" Regina leaves, as Alberta tells Sarah "Look at what I found this morning in Ward Jr's bedroom." Myrtle and Sarah looks at a pregnancy test, and Myrtle asks Alberta "Are you trying to tell us you are pregnant? I hope so." Alberta reminds her friend "I am 65, and sadly no." Sarah sighs with disgust "Amelia is Mama." Alberta yells "Damn right! And by the way, guess who's been staying with me?" Sarah is silent, as she fumes, as Myrtle asks "Your Mama?" Alberta snaps "Amelia! In Ward Jr's room! What are we going to do Sarah?" Sarah pulls out her cell phone, as she calls her Granddaughter, and gets no message, and Sarah leaves a message, telling Amelia "Call me ASAP!" Sarah hangs up, as Alberta tells Sarah "We're going to Amelia's apartment. She's moving." Sarah screams "WHAT!" Myrtle quips "Forget the mall, I'm going with the two of you."
At Amelia's Apartment, Amelia and Ward Jr kiss, as Amelia tells her fiancee "At least now I'll be closer to MaMa, and Grandma living with you, and Alberta and your Dad." Ward Jr sighs "Well he isn't pleased, and I haven't told Mama yet." Amelia asks "I thought you told her?" Ward Jr replies "I don't know how." Amelia sighs "Well I haven't said anything to MaMa yet either. If she learns of this she will rip me to shreds." Ward Jr assures Amelia "Nobody knows. And my Mama respects my privacy." The door swings open, as Sarah, Alberta, and Myrtle walk inside, as Sarah asks her Granddaughter "So what's with the boxes?" Myrtle looks around, as Alberta pulls out the pregnancy test, and Ward Jr yells at his Mother "Who said you could go through my shit Mama.." Alberta slaps her Son, as Sarah slaps her Granddaughter, as Alberta yells at Ward Jr "Don't you disrespect me! My damn house, and I'll do as I please boy so don't push my buttons!" Sarah asks her Granddaughter meanwhile, in a calm, angry, tone "So are you pregnant? Why are you moving?" Amelia responds "I don't know MaMa." Myrtle quips "My house is full." Sarah asks sarcastically "You don't know? The test says you are, and you're moving?" Ward Jr glares at his Mother, as Alberta asks "Who the hell told you that Amelia could live with us? It sure as hell wasn't your Father, and you sure didn't ask me!" Ward Jr looks at Amelia, as he yells at his Mother "Well then! We'll just stay here and when we find out for sure Amelia's pregnant, then none of you will know!" Sarah looks at her Granddaughter, as she asks "So have you put your notice in? Because you're not staying with me." Amelia picks up the notice, and rips it apart, as she yells at her Grandmother "I'm staying, and all of you get the hell out of my Apartment!" Alberta warns Ward Jr "This isn't over." Sarah looks at Amelia, and tells her boldly "If you can have a child, then I don't have to pay for your way. So both of you need to find a damn job!" Myrtle looks at Amelia, and quips "Well you don't want to know what I think." Amelia yells "Tell me Grandma!" Myrtle slaps her Great-Granddaughter, as she goes "You are turning into Regina, and my Sarah didn't raise no slut!" Sarah, Alberta, and Myrtle storms out, as Amelia and Ward Jr looks at each other with disbelief, meanwhile outside, Sarah looks at Alberta, as Myrtle asks "Where did the two of you go wrong?"
A few hours pass, and back at Alberta and Ward's home, Alberta sits in her living room, as Ward walks inside, and Ward asks his Wife "So Junior called and said you hit him?" Alberta responds "Yes the hell I did Ward, he needs to show some respect!" Ward asks "Ain't I the one supposed to hit the kids woman?" Alberta rolls her eyes, and points to Ward's recliner, and tells him "Well if you knew the whole story, you'd killed him." Ward is quiet, as he asks with hesitation "Did he fertilize the half-breed?" Alberta sighs "I found a pregnancy test in his room." Ward snaps "The boy's 20 years old Alberta! Why would you go through his shit?" Alberta snaps "Well it's our damn house, so I have a right to do so. Should have hid it more carefully. Did you know she was planning to move in?" Ward gets up in a fury, and yells "Hell no! Hell no she ain't moving in with us!" Alberta starts to cry, as she tells her Husband "Well he moved in with Amelia instead." Next door at Myrtle's home, Myrtle sits in the den, as Regina and Ted walks inside, as Regina asks her Mother, noticing anger "What's wrong Mama?" Myrtle glares at her Daughter, and sighs "We have another slut in the family." Regina asks "Did Sarah finally admit it?" Myrtle yells "No! But her Granddaughter is, and pregnant!" Regina smiles "Oh? Well well. Anytime I hear news like this..." Myrtle sternly warns Regina, as Ted walks back into the den with a beer "Don't dare get involved! Miranda got pregnant at 16 if I remember correctly, and Marie was 18." Regina reminds her Mother "This isn't about me, but Sarah. Looks like Ms.Perfect failed." Sarah meanwhile walks into the den, as she's overheard her Sister, and asks "What did you say Regina? You are now the perfect parent? Your kids didn't know who to call Daddy because you were too busy playing musical beds. You stay the hell out of this!" Ted looks at his Wife, and tells her "Regina, we should go down to the bar. Too damn tense here." Sarah snaps "Good idea, the last thing I need right now is to deal with the two of you." Regina smiles at her Sister, as she goes "Your first Great-Grandchild, better start making that quilt.." Myrtle yells "LEAVE!" Regina and Ted leaves, as Regina yells "Someone's outside." An older woman walks inside, as Myrtle asks "Zara?" Zara Washington, Alberta's Mother, who's buzzed, goes "Your all white?" Myrtle asks "Are you lost?" Zara looks at Myrtle and Sarah, and asks "Who slapped my baby?" Myrtle responds "Nobody slapped Alberta." Zara yells "Little Ward!" Myrtle responds "Maybe you should go ask your Daughter." Zara snaps "Good. She done moved to whitey-town, and now she's turning into one." Zara mumbles as she walks out "I warned them, I warned them..." Myrtle looks over at her Daughter, as Sarah gets upset, as she asks "Mama, what did I do wrong?" Myrtle responds "Kids these days Sarah. They think they can do whatever they want." Sarah sighs "I stand by what I said. If she can have a kid, she can take care of herself. I'm not paying for that tuition either." Myrtle looks at her Daughter, and responds "Give Mama a hug." Sarah hugs her Mother, as Myrtle whispers "I wish I could have been more forceful with Regina when she was pregnant with her first kid, but.." Sarah responds "Daddy." Myrtle sighs "He was the only one that had a soft spot for her."
Meanwhile at Amelia's Apartment, Amelia gets off the phone, as Ward Jr asks Amelia "So who was that?" Amelia yells "MaMa just cut my funds for college! She has it in for us!" Ward Jr responds "We may have an ally in my Dad, but only until Mama talks to him." Amelia sighs "Well at least your Grandma seems to support us. She did offer to move in." Ward Jr tells Amelia "Well her favorite past time involves a bottle of cheap wine, and riding the bus and tormenting my Dad. Since we live in the inner city, she may..." Amelia notices Ward Jr freeze up, as she asks "What's wrong?" Ward Jr tells Amelia "I don't think I can handle this. I don't have a job, you don't have a job..." Ward Jr walks into the bedroom, as Amelia yells "Don't you dare do this to me." Ward Jr walks out with his suitcase, and tells Amelia "I'm going back home." Amelia yells "So you're going to leave me here to fend for myself?" Ward Jr responds "I need my Mama." Ward Jr leaves, as Amelia's phone rings, and she responds "Thank you." Amelia sits on the futon, and starts to cry, as she too leaves, as she heads to Myrtle's Home.
As night's fallen, at Myrtle's Home, Sarah and Myrtle sits on the patio, as Myrtle tells Sarah, pointing towards the neighbors home behind her "Looks like the horny birds are at it again." Mitzi walks over, as she tells Myrtle "I can see better from here." Sarah sighs "This is the last thing I need to see right now." Sarah walks back inside, as Myrtle pulls out a bag of nachos, and tells Mitzi "Let's sit back and watch the neighborhood porno." Sarah walks inside, as Amelia yells from the front door "MaMa!" Sarah answers, and asks her Granddaughter "Why are you here?" Amelia starts to cry, as she tells her Grandmother "Ward Jr left me." Sarah is silent, as Amelia cries "I can't handle this MaMa." Sarah tells Amelia "Well you should have used protection as I told you." Amelia asks "Can I stay here tonight?" Sarah asks "You told me you can take care of yourself. Why do you need me?" Amelia cries "I don't want to be by myself." Sarah sighs "I give in. You can stay in my room, and go to bed. I'll go talk to Ward Jr. Just don't walk back on the patio." Amelia asks "Why?" Sarah whispers "Your Grandma and Aunt Mitzi's watching the neighbors in the back have sex." Next door, Ward Jr arrives, as Alberta walks into the living room in her bathrobe, as does Ward, as their Son asks "Can I move back in?" Ward is silent, as Alberta responds "No. You have a responsibility now Daddy. You can't walk away from it." Ward responds "Too many young black men walk away when the going gets tough boy, my Dad left me, and if that half-breed's pregnant, you're staying with her, and raising that kid!" Ward Jr responds "I'm not ready." Alberta snaps "Well you go back to Amelia's apartment and stick it out! That's what got you into this mess!" The doorbell rings, and Alberta answers, as Sarah walks inside, and glares at Ward Jr, and asks calmly "So you left my Granddaughter?" Alberta tells Sarah "He's on his way back." A laugh's heard from the back porch, as Zara yells "Those two whites are like rabbits in the pool." Sarah tells Ward Jr "Well Amelia's with me, and in the morning we're going to find out if she's pregnant. Her Father walked away from Jenny when she was pregnant, and I think it's cowardly to walk away." Ward nods "I said the same damn thing." Ward Jr yells "Well all of you can take your thoughts and go to hell..." Alberta slaps her Son again, as Ward shakes his head, as Ward Jr yells "I'm going to talk to Amelia." Sarah snaps "No you're not." Ward Jr yells "It's between us!" Zara yells from outside "Shut up! y'all are distracting me!" Alberta yells at her Mother "Go to bed!" Ward Jr yells "Well I'm heading over!" Alberta yells "Go to your room!" Ward Jr asks "Why?" Ward yells forcefully "You heard her!" Alberta looks at Sarah, and tells her "Let me know what happens tomorrow at the OBGYN." Sarah nods, and walks out, as Zara walks inside, and quips "There's some crazy folks in whitey-hood." Alberta looks at her Mother, and sighs "Don't start tonight."
A day later, at Myrtle's Home, Myrtle sits on the patio, as Mitzi sits with her as they drink water, and Myrtle quips "Any moment now they will be in that pool." Mitzi asks Myrtle, noticing fencing on the ground "I think they're about to build a fence to block us from watching." Myrtle yells "Damn!" Myrtle yells to her Neighbor in the back, as he puts up a wooden fence "Stay inside you wrinkled old horny bastards. And now I won't have to worry about getting ugly-blindness!" Mitzi asks "What do you think possessed them to put up the fence?" Myrtle points towards Alberta and Ward's home, and asks "Remember that laughing and yelling from the back porch?" Mitzi nods, and Myrtle answers "Thank Zara for spoiling our fun." Meanwhile inside, Sarah and Amelia returns from the OBGYN, as Amelia quips "I bought that test at the SuperMart." Sarah quips "That explains it then." Myrtle walks inside, and asks "So are you pregnant?" Amelia shakes her head, and Sarah tells her Mother "A faulty test." Myrtle breathes a sigh of relief, as she responds "I'm not ready for another Great-Great Grandchild again." Sarah quips "Maybe you should tell that to Regina's Grandchildren." Myrtle responds "Well that's not my call. They learned from her." Amelia looks at her Grandmother, and asks "So are you going to pay for my tuition again since I'm not pregnant?" Sarah responds "Half. You are getting a job. You're an adult, so you need some responsibility. You'll be distracted from making attempts then." Ward Jr knocks at the door, as Sarah answers, and Ward Jr walks over to Amelia, and tells her "I'm sorry about the way I acted, and Mama just told me." Amelia sighs "It sucks." Sarah responds "A blessing in disguise. Both of you aren't ready, and neither are Alberta and I." Amelia looks at Ward Jr, and laughs "I'm taking birth control again, so we can still practice." Ward Jr smiles "Nobody's home next door." Amelia and Ward Jr run out, as Sarah shakes her head, as she says to herself "There's no hope for her." Myrtle puts her hand on her Daughter's shoulder, and sighs "Kids these days Sarah. At least she's taking the pill." Sarah pulls out the bottle, and sighs "And she left them here." Myrtle rolls her eyes, and Sarah tells her Mother "She took one when we left the OBGYN. But I'll make sure she takes them, and if not, then.." Myrtle sighs "I'll slap her next time."
A few hours pass, and back at Alberta and Ward's home, Alberta sits in her living room, as Ward walks inside, and Ward asks his Wife "So Junior called and said you hit him?" Alberta responds "Yes the hell I did Ward, he needs to show some respect!" Ward asks "Ain't I the one supposed to hit the kids woman?" Alberta rolls her eyes, and points to Ward's recliner, and tells him "Well if you knew the whole story, you'd killed him." Ward is quiet, as he asks with hesitation "Did he fertilize the half-breed?" Alberta sighs "I found a pregnancy test in his room." Ward snaps "The boy's 20 years old Alberta! Why would you go through his shit?" Alberta snaps "Well it's our damn house, so I have a right to do so. Should have hid it more carefully. Did you know she was planning to move in?" Ward gets up in a fury, and yells "Hell no! Hell no she ain't moving in with us!" Alberta starts to cry, as she tells her Husband "Well he moved in with Amelia instead." Next door at Myrtle's home, Myrtle sits in the den, as Regina and Ted walks inside, as Regina asks her Mother, noticing anger "What's wrong Mama?" Myrtle glares at her Daughter, and sighs "We have another slut in the family." Regina asks "Did Sarah finally admit it?" Myrtle yells "No! But her Granddaughter is, and pregnant!" Regina smiles "Oh? Well well. Anytime I hear news like this..." Myrtle sternly warns Regina, as Ted walks back into the den with a beer "Don't dare get involved! Miranda got pregnant at 16 if I remember correctly, and Marie was 18." Regina reminds her Mother "This isn't about me, but Sarah. Looks like Ms.Perfect failed." Sarah meanwhile walks into the den, as she's overheard her Sister, and asks "What did you say Regina? You are now the perfect parent? Your kids didn't know who to call Daddy because you were too busy playing musical beds. You stay the hell out of this!" Ted looks at his Wife, and tells her "Regina, we should go down to the bar. Too damn tense here." Sarah snaps "Good idea, the last thing I need right now is to deal with the two of you." Regina smiles at her Sister, as she goes "Your first Great-Grandchild, better start making that quilt.." Myrtle yells "LEAVE!" Regina and Ted leaves, as Regina yells "Someone's outside." An older woman walks inside, as Myrtle asks "Zara?" Zara Washington, Alberta's Mother, who's buzzed, goes "Your all white?" Myrtle asks "Are you lost?" Zara looks at Myrtle and Sarah, and asks "Who slapped my baby?" Myrtle responds "Nobody slapped Alberta." Zara yells "Little Ward!" Myrtle responds "Maybe you should go ask your Daughter." Zara snaps "Good. She done moved to whitey-town, and now she's turning into one." Zara mumbles as she walks out "I warned them, I warned them..." Myrtle looks over at her Daughter, as Sarah gets upset, as she asks "Mama, what did I do wrong?" Myrtle responds "Kids these days Sarah. They think they can do whatever they want." Sarah sighs "I stand by what I said. If she can have a kid, she can take care of herself. I'm not paying for that tuition either." Myrtle looks at her Daughter, and responds "Give Mama a hug." Sarah hugs her Mother, as Myrtle whispers "I wish I could have been more forceful with Regina when she was pregnant with her first kid, but.." Sarah responds "Daddy." Myrtle sighs "He was the only one that had a soft spot for her."
Meanwhile at Amelia's Apartment, Amelia gets off the phone, as Ward Jr asks Amelia "So who was that?" Amelia yells "MaMa just cut my funds for college! She has it in for us!" Ward Jr responds "We may have an ally in my Dad, but only until Mama talks to him." Amelia sighs "Well at least your Grandma seems to support us. She did offer to move in." Ward Jr tells Amelia "Well her favorite past time involves a bottle of cheap wine, and riding the bus and tormenting my Dad. Since we live in the inner city, she may..." Amelia notices Ward Jr freeze up, as she asks "What's wrong?" Ward Jr tells Amelia "I don't think I can handle this. I don't have a job, you don't have a job..." Ward Jr walks into the bedroom, as Amelia yells "Don't you dare do this to me." Ward Jr walks out with his suitcase, and tells Amelia "I'm going back home." Amelia yells "So you're going to leave me here to fend for myself?" Ward Jr responds "I need my Mama." Ward Jr leaves, as Amelia's phone rings, and she responds "Thank you." Amelia sits on the futon, and starts to cry, as she too leaves, as she heads to Myrtle's Home.
As night's fallen, at Myrtle's Home, Sarah and Myrtle sits on the patio, as Myrtle tells Sarah, pointing towards the neighbors home behind her "Looks like the horny birds are at it again." Mitzi walks over, as she tells Myrtle "I can see better from here." Sarah sighs "This is the last thing I need to see right now." Sarah walks back inside, as Myrtle pulls out a bag of nachos, and tells Mitzi "Let's sit back and watch the neighborhood porno." Sarah walks inside, as Amelia yells from the front door "MaMa!" Sarah answers, and asks her Granddaughter "Why are you here?" Amelia starts to cry, as she tells her Grandmother "Ward Jr left me." Sarah is silent, as Amelia cries "I can't handle this MaMa." Sarah tells Amelia "Well you should have used protection as I told you." Amelia asks "Can I stay here tonight?" Sarah asks "You told me you can take care of yourself. Why do you need me?" Amelia cries "I don't want to be by myself." Sarah sighs "I give in. You can stay in my room, and go to bed. I'll go talk to Ward Jr. Just don't walk back on the patio." Amelia asks "Why?" Sarah whispers "Your Grandma and Aunt Mitzi's watching the neighbors in the back have sex." Next door, Ward Jr arrives, as Alberta walks into the living room in her bathrobe, as does Ward, as their Son asks "Can I move back in?" Ward is silent, as Alberta responds "No. You have a responsibility now Daddy. You can't walk away from it." Ward responds "Too many young black men walk away when the going gets tough boy, my Dad left me, and if that half-breed's pregnant, you're staying with her, and raising that kid!" Ward Jr responds "I'm not ready." Alberta snaps "Well you go back to Amelia's apartment and stick it out! That's what got you into this mess!" The doorbell rings, and Alberta answers, as Sarah walks inside, and glares at Ward Jr, and asks calmly "So you left my Granddaughter?" Alberta tells Sarah "He's on his way back." A laugh's heard from the back porch, as Zara yells "Those two whites are like rabbits in the pool." Sarah tells Ward Jr "Well Amelia's with me, and in the morning we're going to find out if she's pregnant. Her Father walked away from Jenny when she was pregnant, and I think it's cowardly to walk away." Ward nods "I said the same damn thing." Ward Jr yells "Well all of you can take your thoughts and go to hell..." Alberta slaps her Son again, as Ward shakes his head, as Ward Jr yells "I'm going to talk to Amelia." Sarah snaps "No you're not." Ward Jr yells "It's between us!" Zara yells from outside "Shut up! y'all are distracting me!" Alberta yells at her Mother "Go to bed!" Ward Jr yells "Well I'm heading over!" Alberta yells "Go to your room!" Ward Jr asks "Why?" Ward yells forcefully "You heard her!" Alberta looks at Sarah, and tells her "Let me know what happens tomorrow at the OBGYN." Sarah nods, and walks out, as Zara walks inside, and quips "There's some crazy folks in whitey-hood." Alberta looks at her Mother, and sighs "Don't start tonight."
A day later, at Myrtle's Home, Myrtle sits on the patio, as Mitzi sits with her as they drink water, and Myrtle quips "Any moment now they will be in that pool." Mitzi asks Myrtle, noticing fencing on the ground "I think they're about to build a fence to block us from watching." Myrtle yells "Damn!" Myrtle yells to her Neighbor in the back, as he puts up a wooden fence "Stay inside you wrinkled old horny bastards. And now I won't have to worry about getting ugly-blindness!" Mitzi asks "What do you think possessed them to put up the fence?" Myrtle points towards Alberta and Ward's home, and asks "Remember that laughing and yelling from the back porch?" Mitzi nods, and Myrtle answers "Thank Zara for spoiling our fun." Meanwhile inside, Sarah and Amelia returns from the OBGYN, as Amelia quips "I bought that test at the SuperMart." Sarah quips "That explains it then." Myrtle walks inside, and asks "So are you pregnant?" Amelia shakes her head, and Sarah tells her Mother "A faulty test." Myrtle breathes a sigh of relief, as she responds "I'm not ready for another Great-Great Grandchild again." Sarah quips "Maybe you should tell that to Regina's Grandchildren." Myrtle responds "Well that's not my call. They learned from her." Amelia looks at her Grandmother, and asks "So are you going to pay for my tuition again since I'm not pregnant?" Sarah responds "Half. You are getting a job. You're an adult, so you need some responsibility. You'll be distracted from making attempts then." Ward Jr knocks at the door, as Sarah answers, and Ward Jr walks over to Amelia, and tells her "I'm sorry about the way I acted, and Mama just told me." Amelia sighs "It sucks." Sarah responds "A blessing in disguise. Both of you aren't ready, and neither are Alberta and I." Amelia looks at Ward Jr, and laughs "I'm taking birth control again, so we can still practice." Ward Jr smiles "Nobody's home next door." Amelia and Ward Jr run out, as Sarah shakes her head, as she says to herself "There's no hope for her." Myrtle puts her hand on her Daughter's shoulder, and sighs "Kids these days Sarah. At least she's taking the pill." Sarah pulls out the bottle, and sighs "And she left them here." Myrtle rolls her eyes, and Sarah tells her Mother "She took one when we left the OBGYN. But I'll make sure she takes them, and if not, then.." Myrtle sighs "I'll slap her next time."
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
Life With Myrtle: Season One. Episode 9. Blind Dates
At Myrtle's Home, Myrtle and Mitzi sits on her porch, as the kids walk down the street from high school, as Mitzi turns to Myrtle, as a spark shows in her eyes, as she snarls to Mitzi "Just look at them damn floozies." Mitzi asks Myrtle "Do you call Amelia a floozie? I've seen how she dresses, a lot like these kids walking down the road." Myrtle sighs "That's Sarah's call, not mine." A car meanwhile pulls into the driveway, as Myrtle snarls to herself, as Mitzi silently watches, as Regina's Daughter, Marie gets out of her car with excitement, as Mitzi smiles "Long time no see." Myrtle welcomes her Granddaughter, and asks "Here to take your Mama and ninth Step-Daddy off my hands?" Marie smiles "No Granny." Myrtle reminds Marie with a grin "Remember when you were young, and you called me Granny that day at the mall?" Marie shakes her head, and responds "No?" Myrtle smiles "I slapped you. I wasn't even 40 yet!" Marie smiles "Well you're my Granny." Myrtle sighs "Well I guess I'll have to slap you again, but I like you, so I'll pass. So what's brought you here?" Marie smiles "My Step-Mom died! Isn't that great?" Mitzi snaps "What's great about someone dying? That's awful!" Myrtle asks "How? Did my second favorite Ex Son In Law kill her? She was one bitter bitch." Marie sits down and sighs "No, though he likely dreamed of it. He's ready to move on now and I had an idea." Mitzi tells Marie "Well the two of you can sit and celebrate death! I'm going home!" Mitzi heads over to her home, as Marie tells her Grandmother what she has in mind, as Myrtle smiles "I like that idea. She needs to get out more."
A hour passes, and Sarah arrives from Amelia's apartment, as she yells "Damn! That girl's wild as hell!" Marie walks out of the kitchen and smiles "Aunt Sarah!" Sarah hugs her Niece, and asks "What's brought you here?" Myrtle follows, as she tells her Daughter "Marie has good news, Phil's single." Sarah asks "Did that bitch he was married to die?" Marie smiles "Yes!" Myrtle tells her Daughter and Granddaughter "Drinks are in order." Sarah reminds her Mother "Remember the last time you drank vodka?" Myrtle sighs "Hell I'll drink one of Ted's cheap beers instead." Myrtle walks into the kitchen, as Marie walks her Aunt into the den, as she asks "You always liked Dad didn't you Aunt Sarah?" Sarah responds "As a Brother In Law, yes. He was the best Husband Regina ever had, and it's a shame she slept with his twin Brother." Marie responds "And since we got that out of the way, Granny and I..." Myrtle walks in the den, and yells "Grandma!" Marie rolls her eyes, and sighs "Grandma and I thought you and my Dad could go out on a date." Sarah laughs sarcastically, as she asks her Niece "What are you up to? Are you mad at your Mother?" Marie shakes her head, and Myrtle quips "Hell it would do you good Sarah. He needs a woman who wouldn't have him whipped like that battleaxe he was married to." Sarah asks Marie "Does he know what you are planning?" Marie shakes her head, and tells her Aunt "Tonight he's going to be in Independence at the General's Inn, and he's expecting to meet me, but instead he'll be meeting you." Sarah reminds her Niece "I don't drink though." Myrtle quips "You go to Colorado once a month though." Marie smiles "I got some of that also." Sarah sighs "Ok. But if your Mother calls me a slut, and I kill her, blame yourself." Myrtle smiles "We'll buy a bottle of vodka and just kill Regina." Sarah heads to her bedroom, as Marie asks her Grandmother "Will Aunt Sarah kill my Mom? Really wouldn't bother me, but?" Myrtle, slightly buzzed, tells her Granddaughter "She's on many shit lists. I got first shot though. Heed these words, I brought her in this world, and I will take her out." Myrtle laughs, as Marie watches on, and tells her Grandmother "I'm leaving before Mom and the wino arrives." Myrtle nods, as Marie leaves, and Myrtle says to herself, as she takes another drink of beer "This is some cheap shit. Next time I'll drink vodka."
Nighttime arrives, and in Independence, at the General's Inn, Sarah walks inside, as she says to herself "Well looks like this place hasn't changed much over the years." Sarah sees Phil, Regina's Second Husband, sitting at the bar, as he drinks, and Sarah taps Phil on the shoulder, with hesitation, as Phil turns and goes "Sarah?" Sarah goes "Phil Wallace. Long time no see." Phil hugs his former Sister In Law, and pulls out a chair for Sarah, as Phil asks "So why are you here?" Sarah sighs "Marie set you up on a date with me Phil." Phil sighs "Typical Marie. I knew she had something planned. So I guess she told you the news about Kate?" Sarah nods, and Phil takes a drink, and quips "If I had of signed that pre-nup, then I'd divorced her years ago. She controlled me, and Marie hated her." Sarah asks "How did the old bitch die excuse my french?" Phil responds "She was having plastic surgery in Mexico. She was turning into cat-woman." Sarah nods, and responds "Sounds like the way she'd want to leave, under a plastic scalpel." Phil asks Sarah "So how's life treating you these days? I heard about Jenny, and sad I couldn't attend.." Sarah tells Phil "I understand. And let's just enjoy our date. I'd prefer just not talking about it." Phil sighs "Same with the old ax, I mean Kate." Sarah tells the bartender "Gin and tonic.".
Meanwhile at Myrtle's Home, Regina sits in the den, along with Ted, as Myrtle tells her Daughter "Marie came to visit me today." Regina goes "Oh? She didn't tell me." Myrtle glares at Ted, as he drinks a beer, and Regina responds "Ted?" Myrtle nods, and quips "She was happy though, Kate died." Regina laughs, as she drinks a beer also, and Ted slurs at Myrtle "Since when did you start drinking MY beer?" Myrtle tells her Son In Law "My house, buy yourself a damn fridge!" Regina snaps at her Husband "Shut up Ted! Mama cooked for us, and being surprisingly nice tonight so shut up!" Myrtle grins, and asks her Daughter "So how was work today sweetie?" Regina gushes "You haven't called me that in years Mama. What's come over you?" Myrtle, buzzed, replies "Probably this cheap beer Ted buys. But we should enjoy each other's company. I'm your Mother, and you're my Daughter. My favorite." Regina starts to cry, as Ted asks "Well what about me?" Myrtle responds "Go stand out in the middle of the road for me." The door opens, as Sarah walks inside, as Regina looks at her Sister, and goes "You're dressed nice. Where did you go tonight?" Sarah smiles "I had a date Regina. And no we didn't hit the sheets and run to the night court and marry." Ted slurs "Wouldn't hurt for you to have a man." Myrtle asks "So how's Phil doing?" Regina's eyes widen, as Sarah responds "Very well. We had a few drinks, and shot a round of pool. He's feeling good." Myrtle responds "I imagine so since Kate's dead." Regina asks in a jealous tone "You? Phil?" Regina turns towards her Mother, and goes "You lied to me tonight? Playing with my emotions while Sarah was trying to sleep with one of my Husbands?" Ted coughs, as Sarah reminds her Sister "You are married, and you shouldn't have slept with Phil's twin Brother and married him, then maybe I wouldn't be going out with him again." Regina yells "AGAIN!" Myrtle sighs "Well Regina, Marie wants Phil to be happy, and I miss him calling me Mother Thomas." Myrtle heads to her bedroom, as Regina yells "Get back here you old woman!" Myrtle smiles, and tells Regina "I don't have wrinkles. Look in the mirror you old bat. Night." Myrtle heads to her bedroom, as Regina yells at her Sister "Don't you think of it." Sarah laughs "I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow night Regina. Now tend to your idiot." Sarah heads to her bedroom, as Ted asks his Wife "Who's Phil?" Regina sighs "Ted, we won't discuss that."
A week passes, and the tension mounts in Myrtle's home, as Myrtle and Mitzi walks inside, as Mitzi asks Myrtle "I hear yelling." Myrtle quips "Marie must be here." Myrtle and Mitzi looks into the den, as Regina yells at her Daughter "How dare you set my Husband up with your Aunt Sarah?" Marie snaps "Well he deserves happiness. Something you or Kate never gave him Mom! And you're married now, so shut the hell up." Mitzi rolls her eyes, and warns Myrtle "Well, look at this, you don't come griping to me about your mess." Regina yells at Mitzi "Damn right it's her mess! She helped my crazy ass Daughter pull this off. They are going steady! Damnit!" Mitzi heads out, and says to herself "Well I guess she gets it from her Mother." Myrtle yells at her Daughter "And where is Ted?" Regina yells "In Grandview Mama! Phil's on his way over here and I'm waiting for him and Sarah!" Myrtle goes "Really? Who invited you?" Regina yells "I pay rent!" Myrtle quips "And my name's on the deed." Marie warns her Mother "You and I are going out for a little while. You can go see your Grandchildren." Regina snaps to her Daughter "The hell with them! I'm staying put!" Regina sits down, and Marie looks at her Grandmother, as Myrtle tells her Granddaughter "Watch your Mother, and practice what you learned working at the Mental Hospital. I hear Sarah and Phil." Regina yells "I'm going out there!" Myrtle walks out, and shuts the door, as Marie holds her Mother back, as Myrtle goes "Phil Wallace! My second favorite Ex-Son In Law! You look well." Sarah sees Regina's car, and asks "So I take it you and Marie couldn't bribe Regina." Phil goes "Regina's here?" Myrtle sighs with disgust "Yes. And she's mad." Phil sighs "Figures." Myrtle asks "So have the two of you jumped into bed yet?" Sarah shockingly responds "Mama! No we haven't! Why would you ask such a thing?" Myrtle quips "Well, feel free to here." Sarah whispers to Phil "Mama's lost her filter." Regina meanwhile storms out, as Marie follows as she yells "Sorry Granny!" Myrtle yells back "Grandma!" Regina yells at her Ex-Husband "So you're missing me so bad you're going to get with Sarah? Yuck." Sarah quips "We're going to the motel, and then down to the courthouse Regina." Regina screams "You SLUT!!" Marie jumps "Are the two of you actually tying the knot?" Sarah looks at her Sister, as Myrtle threatens Regina with pepper spray, as Mitzi walks outside and watches on, as Sarah laughs "No Marie. We're friends, but I just had to do that to piss your Mother off." Regina yells at her Sister "It's not funny Sarah!" Sarah responds "The hell it isn't." Mitzi yells "I got a photo! I'm going to see if Johnny will print this." Mitzi runs back in her home, as Myrtle tells Sarah "She fell for it." Phil quips "I'm like Sarah when it comes to marriage, I'd just prefer staying single. We're both content Mother Thomas." Myrtle hugs Phil, and looks at Regina, as she tells Sarah "See Sarah! He was never interested in you!" Marie snaps at her Mother "Aunt Sarah's more of a Mom to me than you've ever been!" Myrtle sighs "Oh hell." Phil looks at Sarah and Myrtle, as Marie and Regina gets into a huge argument, and asks "So would the two of you like to go to dinner? I have seen these two talk, this is common." Myrtle and Sarah accepts, and they leave with Phil, as Regina argues with her Daughter on the porch, as Mitzi sits on her porch, and sighs "Too damn much alike."
A hour passes, and Sarah arrives from Amelia's apartment, as she yells "Damn! That girl's wild as hell!" Marie walks out of the kitchen and smiles "Aunt Sarah!" Sarah hugs her Niece, and asks "What's brought you here?" Myrtle follows, as she tells her Daughter "Marie has good news, Phil's single." Sarah asks "Did that bitch he was married to die?" Marie smiles "Yes!" Myrtle tells her Daughter and Granddaughter "Drinks are in order." Sarah reminds her Mother "Remember the last time you drank vodka?" Myrtle sighs "Hell I'll drink one of Ted's cheap beers instead." Myrtle walks into the kitchen, as Marie walks her Aunt into the den, as she asks "You always liked Dad didn't you Aunt Sarah?" Sarah responds "As a Brother In Law, yes. He was the best Husband Regina ever had, and it's a shame she slept with his twin Brother." Marie responds "And since we got that out of the way, Granny and I..." Myrtle walks in the den, and yells "Grandma!" Marie rolls her eyes, and sighs "Grandma and I thought you and my Dad could go out on a date." Sarah laughs sarcastically, as she asks her Niece "What are you up to? Are you mad at your Mother?" Marie shakes her head, and Myrtle quips "Hell it would do you good Sarah. He needs a woman who wouldn't have him whipped like that battleaxe he was married to." Sarah asks Marie "Does he know what you are planning?" Marie shakes her head, and tells her Aunt "Tonight he's going to be in Independence at the General's Inn, and he's expecting to meet me, but instead he'll be meeting you." Sarah reminds her Niece "I don't drink though." Myrtle quips "You go to Colorado once a month though." Marie smiles "I got some of that also." Sarah sighs "Ok. But if your Mother calls me a slut, and I kill her, blame yourself." Myrtle smiles "We'll buy a bottle of vodka and just kill Regina." Sarah heads to her bedroom, as Marie asks her Grandmother "Will Aunt Sarah kill my Mom? Really wouldn't bother me, but?" Myrtle, slightly buzzed, tells her Granddaughter "She's on many shit lists. I got first shot though. Heed these words, I brought her in this world, and I will take her out." Myrtle laughs, as Marie watches on, and tells her Grandmother "I'm leaving before Mom and the wino arrives." Myrtle nods, as Marie leaves, and Myrtle says to herself, as she takes another drink of beer "This is some cheap shit. Next time I'll drink vodka."
Nighttime arrives, and in Independence, at the General's Inn, Sarah walks inside, as she says to herself "Well looks like this place hasn't changed much over the years." Sarah sees Phil, Regina's Second Husband, sitting at the bar, as he drinks, and Sarah taps Phil on the shoulder, with hesitation, as Phil turns and goes "Sarah?" Sarah goes "Phil Wallace. Long time no see." Phil hugs his former Sister In Law, and pulls out a chair for Sarah, as Phil asks "So why are you here?" Sarah sighs "Marie set you up on a date with me Phil." Phil sighs "Typical Marie. I knew she had something planned. So I guess she told you the news about Kate?" Sarah nods, and Phil takes a drink, and quips "If I had of signed that pre-nup, then I'd divorced her years ago. She controlled me, and Marie hated her." Sarah asks "How did the old bitch die excuse my french?" Phil responds "She was having plastic surgery in Mexico. She was turning into cat-woman." Sarah nods, and responds "Sounds like the way she'd want to leave, under a plastic scalpel." Phil asks Sarah "So how's life treating you these days? I heard about Jenny, and sad I couldn't attend.." Sarah tells Phil "I understand. And let's just enjoy our date. I'd prefer just not talking about it." Phil sighs "Same with the old ax, I mean Kate." Sarah tells the bartender "Gin and tonic.".
Meanwhile at Myrtle's Home, Regina sits in the den, along with Ted, as Myrtle tells her Daughter "Marie came to visit me today." Regina goes "Oh? She didn't tell me." Myrtle glares at Ted, as he drinks a beer, and Regina responds "Ted?" Myrtle nods, and quips "She was happy though, Kate died." Regina laughs, as she drinks a beer also, and Ted slurs at Myrtle "Since when did you start drinking MY beer?" Myrtle tells her Son In Law "My house, buy yourself a damn fridge!" Regina snaps at her Husband "Shut up Ted! Mama cooked for us, and being surprisingly nice tonight so shut up!" Myrtle grins, and asks her Daughter "So how was work today sweetie?" Regina gushes "You haven't called me that in years Mama. What's come over you?" Myrtle, buzzed, replies "Probably this cheap beer Ted buys. But we should enjoy each other's company. I'm your Mother, and you're my Daughter. My favorite." Regina starts to cry, as Ted asks "Well what about me?" Myrtle responds "Go stand out in the middle of the road for me." The door opens, as Sarah walks inside, as Regina looks at her Sister, and goes "You're dressed nice. Where did you go tonight?" Sarah smiles "I had a date Regina. And no we didn't hit the sheets and run to the night court and marry." Ted slurs "Wouldn't hurt for you to have a man." Myrtle asks "So how's Phil doing?" Regina's eyes widen, as Sarah responds "Very well. We had a few drinks, and shot a round of pool. He's feeling good." Myrtle responds "I imagine so since Kate's dead." Regina asks in a jealous tone "You? Phil?" Regina turns towards her Mother, and goes "You lied to me tonight? Playing with my emotions while Sarah was trying to sleep with one of my Husbands?" Ted coughs, as Sarah reminds her Sister "You are married, and you shouldn't have slept with Phil's twin Brother and married him, then maybe I wouldn't be going out with him again." Regina yells "AGAIN!" Myrtle sighs "Well Regina, Marie wants Phil to be happy, and I miss him calling me Mother Thomas." Myrtle heads to her bedroom, as Regina yells "Get back here you old woman!" Myrtle smiles, and tells Regina "I don't have wrinkles. Look in the mirror you old bat. Night." Myrtle heads to her bedroom, as Regina yells at her Sister "Don't you think of it." Sarah laughs "I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow night Regina. Now tend to your idiot." Sarah heads to her bedroom, as Ted asks his Wife "Who's Phil?" Regina sighs "Ted, we won't discuss that."
A week passes, and the tension mounts in Myrtle's home, as Myrtle and Mitzi walks inside, as Mitzi asks Myrtle "I hear yelling." Myrtle quips "Marie must be here." Myrtle and Mitzi looks into the den, as Regina yells at her Daughter "How dare you set my Husband up with your Aunt Sarah?" Marie snaps "Well he deserves happiness. Something you or Kate never gave him Mom! And you're married now, so shut the hell up." Mitzi rolls her eyes, and warns Myrtle "Well, look at this, you don't come griping to me about your mess." Regina yells at Mitzi "Damn right it's her mess! She helped my crazy ass Daughter pull this off. They are going steady! Damnit!" Mitzi heads out, and says to herself "Well I guess she gets it from her Mother." Myrtle yells at her Daughter "And where is Ted?" Regina yells "In Grandview Mama! Phil's on his way over here and I'm waiting for him and Sarah!" Myrtle goes "Really? Who invited you?" Regina yells "I pay rent!" Myrtle quips "And my name's on the deed." Marie warns her Mother "You and I are going out for a little while. You can go see your Grandchildren." Regina snaps to her Daughter "The hell with them! I'm staying put!" Regina sits down, and Marie looks at her Grandmother, as Myrtle tells her Granddaughter "Watch your Mother, and practice what you learned working at the Mental Hospital. I hear Sarah and Phil." Regina yells "I'm going out there!" Myrtle walks out, and shuts the door, as Marie holds her Mother back, as Myrtle goes "Phil Wallace! My second favorite Ex-Son In Law! You look well." Sarah sees Regina's car, and asks "So I take it you and Marie couldn't bribe Regina." Phil goes "Regina's here?" Myrtle sighs with disgust "Yes. And she's mad." Phil sighs "Figures." Myrtle asks "So have the two of you jumped into bed yet?" Sarah shockingly responds "Mama! No we haven't! Why would you ask such a thing?" Myrtle quips "Well, feel free to here." Sarah whispers to Phil "Mama's lost her filter." Regina meanwhile storms out, as Marie follows as she yells "Sorry Granny!" Myrtle yells back "Grandma!" Regina yells at her Ex-Husband "So you're missing me so bad you're going to get with Sarah? Yuck." Sarah quips "We're going to the motel, and then down to the courthouse Regina." Regina screams "You SLUT!!" Marie jumps "Are the two of you actually tying the knot?" Sarah looks at her Sister, as Myrtle threatens Regina with pepper spray, as Mitzi walks outside and watches on, as Sarah laughs "No Marie. We're friends, but I just had to do that to piss your Mother off." Regina yells at her Sister "It's not funny Sarah!" Sarah responds "The hell it isn't." Mitzi yells "I got a photo! I'm going to see if Johnny will print this." Mitzi runs back in her home, as Myrtle tells Sarah "She fell for it." Phil quips "I'm like Sarah when it comes to marriage, I'd just prefer staying single. We're both content Mother Thomas." Myrtle hugs Phil, and looks at Regina, as she tells Sarah "See Sarah! He was never interested in you!" Marie snaps at her Mother "Aunt Sarah's more of a Mom to me than you've ever been!" Myrtle sighs "Oh hell." Phil looks at Sarah and Myrtle, as Marie and Regina gets into a huge argument, and asks "So would the two of you like to go to dinner? I have seen these two talk, this is common." Myrtle and Sarah accepts, and they leave with Phil, as Regina argues with her Daughter on the porch, as Mitzi sits on her porch, and sighs "Too damn much alike."
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Life With Myrtle: Season One. Episode 8. The Dodger
At Alberta and Ward's Home, Myrtle sits in a chair in the basement, as Alberta styles Myrtle's hair, as Alberta tells her "I think this will look great. I apologize for all the mess in here." Myrtle sighs "Hell you just moved in, but I notice someone's trying to take this sanctuary from you from the looks of that couch and TV." Alberta sighs "My Husband." Meanwhile, the door to the basement opens, as Ward Woods Sr, Alberta's Husband of over 40 years, walks downstairs, telling his Wife "We got all the mail again. Some interesting stuff." Alberta looks over the envelopes, as she asks her Husband "Did you go through everybody's mail?" Ward responds "Yeah." Alberta asks "Why?" Ward responds "Just want to know how to live in white man's land.." Myrtle looks over, as Ward tells Myrtle "Tell that damn wino Son-In-Law to stop throwing his white trash in my yard." Alberta snarls "Our yard." Ward snarks "Whatever woman." Myrtle asks "Since when am I white trash Ward?" Ward responds to Myrtle "Nothing against you, or Sarah, but Regina, and that Granddaughter of Sarah's, damn.." Alberta rolls her eyes, as she warns Ward "Don't get started." Meanwhile Ward looks at another letter, and asks Myrtle "So who's JWR?" Alberta hits Ward on the shoulder, as he reads out loud "I'll be in town tomorrow. Moving on?" Myrtle reminds Ward "Remember John Wayne and Roy Rogers?" Ward quips "I didn't watch that shit." Alberta glares at Ward, as Myrtle goes "Remember the fastest Running Back and Wide Receiver at East High School?" Ward answers "William Thomas?" Myrtle nods, as she reminds Ward "My Son Ward." Ward exclaims "Ahh! William! I didn't know he was your Son." Alberta asks her Husband "Did you hit your head? You knew that. I'm thinking you and Mama need to stop drinking together." Ward walks upstairs, as Myrtle tells Alberta "My boy's on his way home."
At Myrtle's Home, Sarah cleans, as Ted yells from the den "Bring me a beer!" Sarah, standing in the kitchen, stops, and walks to the den, and asks Ted "Do I look like your Wife?" Ted yells "Well she should be serving me!" Sarah snaps "Well you have two legs that work, take your ass to the kitchen if you want a damn beer!" Ted gets up, and heads to the door, as he yells "I get better service in Grandview!" Sarah yells back at her Brother In Law "And this ain't Mama's Bar, so go to Grandview and stay there you drunk impotent piece of shit!" Ted opens the door, as a man stands on the other side, as he asks Ted "Who in the hell are you?" Ted responds "I live here. And you are soliciting." Meanwhile Myrtle walks across the yard, as she sees her Son, William standing at the door, as Myrtle yells with excitement "William!" William runs to his Mother, as they hug, and William asks his Mother "Who's the asshole living with you Mama?" Myrtle sighs with disgust "Regina's tenth Husband." William rolls his eyes, as he asks "Want me to kick his ass?" Ted looks at William, and snarks "Oh. Oh. Regina told me about you. You didn't serve in the war. You're a disgrace." Myrtle warns Ted "If I were you, I'd go to my stool at The Losers Club Teddy Bear." William asks "So Regina's still herself I take it?" Myrtle holds her Son's hand, as she walks him inside, and sighs "She lives here now, and so does Sarah." William smiles "There's someone I'd want to see." Myrtle and William walks inside, as Myrtle yells for Sarah, and tells William "Stand at the door." William walks out, as Sarah tells her Mother "Alberta did a great job on your hair." Myrtle quickly bows, and sighs "Thank you. Open the door." Sarah asks suspiciously "Why?" Myrtle nudges her Daughter, as Sarah opens, and cries "William!" William hugs his Sister, and goes "Sarah it's been too long!" Sarah nods, and replies "Yes it has." Myrtle exclaims "My two favorite children are home. Now let's all sit down." Myrtle, William, and Sarah sits inside the living room, as William tells his Mother "Well I got everything cleared finally, and I can come home without getting arrested." Myrtle holds William's hand with content, as she sighs "Finally. I have missed you so much." William asks his youngest Sister "So I hear you named your Son after me?" Sarah smiles "I did. And I guess Mama's filled you in over the years John Wayne Rogers." William laughs "Good alias huh?" Myrtle smiles "It certainly was my little cowboy." William laughs "I'm almost 65, I think I'm the old cowboy now." Myrtle quips "You have aged very well, and look like your Daddy." William sighs "I wish we could have made peace." Myrtle looks at Sarah, as she warns her Son "Well enjoy this peace until Regina comes home."
Evening has arrived, as Myrtle and Sarah are in the kitchen, as Sarah tells her Mother happily "I'm glad William got everything taken care of with the government. Think he'll move back." Myrtle quips "I'll let him move in and kick your Sister out." Sarah laughs, as does Myrtle, as William's outside, as William and Ward sits on the porch, as William and Ward reminisce on their childhood, as William tells Ward "It was good you and I played for the same team." Ward quips "I know. I think you were the only white I didn't break in two in High School." William asks "So you still have your prejudices Ward?" Ward sighs "Nah. Now I don't like anyone. That's driving the city bus. You were smart. I shouldn't have shot myself in the leg. I lost out on that scholarship over that. I wasn't going to serve either in Vietnam." William tells his friend "When Bobby was killed, that was that for me. I knew it was bullshit and I wasn't fighting in a bullshit war." Myrtle walks outside with sweet tea, and smiles "Well look at this. Ward Woods is acting civil." Ward laughs "Myrtle, William and I always got along. We've been friends since integration." Myrtle asks "Should I call your Wife and tell her about this moment?" Ward warns Myrtle "Don't tell her or I won't be able to live it down." Sarah walks on the porch, as William asks Ward "So you married Alberta Washington?" Ward sighs "Yeah. And she drives me crazy. Especially her Mother. She sits behind me every day, and we take shots together when we make stops. She and I get along, though she drives Alberta crazy." Meanwhile in Grandview, Regina arrives at The Veteran's Club, as Ted looks at his Wife, and tells her "Your sorry ass Brother's in town." Regina rolls her eyes, as she sighs in disgust "Daddy would roll in his grave knowing he was back. Sorry bastard." Ted takes another drink, as Regina also orders a beer, as she gripes "Just wait until we get home. Won't be a pleasant reunion. William will be back to wherever he's been before the night's done."
A hour's passed, and Myrtle sits in the den, as William and Sarah sits with her, as William tells his Mother "Dinner was excellent." Myrtle smiles, as she sighs "It was nice." Sarah adds "It's definitely nice without Regina here..." The front door slams open, as Regina and Ted storms inside, and Regina walks into the den, and William quips to his Oldest Sister "Age hasn't been good to you. You look like hell." Myrtle laughs, as Regina yells "Get the hell out of this house you ungrateful bastard!" Sarah stands up, as she glares at Regina, as does Myrtle, as Ted yells "You are a disgrace to America." William looks at Ted, and warns him "From what Sarah's said and Mama, you lied your way into the Veteran's Club of Grandview. And I don't like the fact the two of you live here and take advantage of my Mother!" Regina yells "Daddy hated you. You were too damn selfish and almost broke up our family!" Myrtle yells at Regina "Hold on there! You let me tell you something! I was against that damn war, and every war that's happened since Korea! Don't even start bringing up the past!" Regina asks her Mother "How would Daddy feel knowing he's here?" Myrtle forcefully slaps Regina in the face, and asks "How does that feel Regina? Is that a damn answer for you?" William tells Regina "When I left, you already were working on a divorce from your first Husband, who was drafted, and then divorced him when you met that other guy. Already had two kids." Regina snaps "Shut up!" Sarah stands by William, as Ted yells "You should be arrested!" Sarah yells, defending her Brother "He got that under control." William walks up out of the den, as he yells with disgust "I won't listen to this shit. I came here to see my Mama, and as far as I'm concerned Regina, you can kiss my damn ass!" Ted blocks the doorway, and William warns Ted "Are you testing me?" Ted snarls "Coward." William responds with a right hook, as Regina yells at William "How dare you hit my Teddy Bear!" Sarah and Myrtle stands back, as Myrtle grows furious, and yells loudly "I want everyone in this house to shut the hell up a damn minute before I pull out the damn pepper spray on Regina and Ted!" Regina yells "Mama you are really disrespecting Daddy letting that piece of shit stay in our home." Myrtle snaps at Regina "Your cousin was killed in that damn war for no reason, and I wasn't about to send William off to Vietnam for no reason! And if you want to judge bitch, look at me, I gave him the damn money to flee!" Regina's jaw drops, as Ted looks at Myrtle, and snaps "You are a disgrace too." Sarah slaps Ted in the face, and the door opens, as Ward walks inside, as he grabs Ted, and kicks him off the porch, as Regina yells at Ward "No need for you to be here!" Ward angrily tells Regina "Ain't no damn body about to disrespect my best friend in this house!" Ward tells William "Come over and stay with us." Myrtle hugs her Son, as she looks at Regina, and tells Ward "No Ward, William will be staying here." William tells his Mother "It'd be best Mama." William grabs his suitcase and heads next door to Alberta and Ward's, as Myrtle locks the door behind her, as Ted yells "Let Me In!" and a few moments later Ted yells again, as Ward also delivers a punch and yells "Keep the damn beer cans out of my yard you damn racist!" Back inside, Myrtle yells for Regina to sit down, as Sarah is silent, fuming with anger, as Regina yells at her Mother and Sister "The two of you make me sick!" Myrtle stands in front of Regina, and tells her Daughter in a stern and bold tone "When William got that draft notice, I told him I didn't want him to go because of Bobby. Your Aunt Ira never recovered from that. Jimmy was hellbent on William serving, and we nearly divorced over it, but Jimmy forgave William, and when I got my job at Jones in Downtown, I gave William my first ever paycheck, and Jimmy's check to help him go to Canada. A parent who loves their children will do whatever it takes to save them. Although with you Regina, there were no hope." Regina gasps "You gave Daddy's check to William?" Myrtle snaps "Shut up! You have no room to talk to me about it, and I won't discuss this again. You should be ashamed of yourself, and Ted can sleep out in his truck, if he comes in this house, Ward will kick his ass!" Myrtle storms off to her bedroom, as Sarah looks at her Sister, and tells her "You need to just go get a room." Regina snarks "The hell I will Sarah!" Sarah asks "Want another slap from me? Here's some money! Leave!" Regina storms out, as Sarah walks outside, and heads over to Alberta and Ward's and knocks on the door, as Alberta answers, and tells Sarah "I heard that fight. And Ward Jr's with Amelia so you know." Sarah rolls her eyes, and asks her friend "Where's my Brother?" Alberta walks with Sarah into the basement, as Ward and William sits, and Sarah tells her Brother "I ran Regina off. Please come back home." Ward tells Sarah "He's fine here. We're enjoying my den." Alberta tells her Husband "This is my private salon, not your manhole Ward!" William asks Sarah "How's Mama?" Sarah sighs "She's upset." Alberta and Ward looks at Sarah and William, and tells William "Go back over there. Myrtle doesn't need this." William picks up his suitcase again, as he tells his Sister "You always had my back Sarah." Sarah tells her Brother "And you are my hero William."
Meanwhile back at Myrtle's Home, Myrtle sits in her bedroom, as she has a flashback, and looks at Jimmy's photo, and cries "Jimmy, he came back, but you weren't here. I'm glad you made peace with him, but he needed to know that." Myrtle hears a voice, that says "Tell our Son I love him, and I'm proud of him Myrtle." Myrtle smiles, as she cries "I will do that Jimmy." Myrtle goes to sleep, as Sarah and William sits in the basement, and catch up, as Sarah asks William, pulling out a box "Wanna relax?" William tells Sarah "I'll pass." Sarah lights a joint, as she quips "My relief from Regina." Sarah then catches her Brother up on everything, as Regina and Ted sits in a motel room in Grandview, both fuming.from the fallout earlier. A few days pass, and William prepares to leave to return to his home in Canada, as Myrtle tells her Son "Next time bring my Grandchildren." William hugs his Mother, and Sarah hugs her Brother, as William tells them "I'm moving back to America soon, and when I do, I'll let the two of you know." As William opens the door to leave, Regina stands on the other side, as Myrtle and Sarah both glare, as Regina looks at William, and tells her Brother "I was wrong William. Will you forgive me?" William hugs Regina, and tells his Oldest Sister "I do." William leaves, as Myrtle asks Regina "What changed your opinion?" Regina tells her Mother and Sister "Someone told me to or else I'd have hell to pay." Myrtle, Sarah, and Regina looks over to the wall, at Jimmy's photo, as all of them hold each other for a moment.
At Myrtle's Home, Sarah cleans, as Ted yells from the den "Bring me a beer!" Sarah, standing in the kitchen, stops, and walks to the den, and asks Ted "Do I look like your Wife?" Ted yells "Well she should be serving me!" Sarah snaps "Well you have two legs that work, take your ass to the kitchen if you want a damn beer!" Ted gets up, and heads to the door, as he yells "I get better service in Grandview!" Sarah yells back at her Brother In Law "And this ain't Mama's Bar, so go to Grandview and stay there you drunk impotent piece of shit!" Ted opens the door, as a man stands on the other side, as he asks Ted "Who in the hell are you?" Ted responds "I live here. And you are soliciting." Meanwhile Myrtle walks across the yard, as she sees her Son, William standing at the door, as Myrtle yells with excitement "William!" William runs to his Mother, as they hug, and William asks his Mother "Who's the asshole living with you Mama?" Myrtle sighs with disgust "Regina's tenth Husband." William rolls his eyes, as he asks "Want me to kick his ass?" Ted looks at William, and snarks "Oh. Oh. Regina told me about you. You didn't serve in the war. You're a disgrace." Myrtle warns Ted "If I were you, I'd go to my stool at The Losers Club Teddy Bear." William asks "So Regina's still herself I take it?" Myrtle holds her Son's hand, as she walks him inside, and sighs "She lives here now, and so does Sarah." William smiles "There's someone I'd want to see." Myrtle and William walks inside, as Myrtle yells for Sarah, and tells William "Stand at the door." William walks out, as Sarah tells her Mother "Alberta did a great job on your hair." Myrtle quickly bows, and sighs "Thank you. Open the door." Sarah asks suspiciously "Why?" Myrtle nudges her Daughter, as Sarah opens, and cries "William!" William hugs his Sister, and goes "Sarah it's been too long!" Sarah nods, and replies "Yes it has." Myrtle exclaims "My two favorite children are home. Now let's all sit down." Myrtle, William, and Sarah sits inside the living room, as William tells his Mother "Well I got everything cleared finally, and I can come home without getting arrested." Myrtle holds William's hand with content, as she sighs "Finally. I have missed you so much." William asks his youngest Sister "So I hear you named your Son after me?" Sarah smiles "I did. And I guess Mama's filled you in over the years John Wayne Rogers." William laughs "Good alias huh?" Myrtle smiles "It certainly was my little cowboy." William laughs "I'm almost 65, I think I'm the old cowboy now." Myrtle quips "You have aged very well, and look like your Daddy." William sighs "I wish we could have made peace." Myrtle looks at Sarah, as she warns her Son "Well enjoy this peace until Regina comes home."
Evening has arrived, as Myrtle and Sarah are in the kitchen, as Sarah tells her Mother happily "I'm glad William got everything taken care of with the government. Think he'll move back." Myrtle quips "I'll let him move in and kick your Sister out." Sarah laughs, as does Myrtle, as William's outside, as William and Ward sits on the porch, as William and Ward reminisce on their childhood, as William tells Ward "It was good you and I played for the same team." Ward quips "I know. I think you were the only white I didn't break in two in High School." William asks "So you still have your prejudices Ward?" Ward sighs "Nah. Now I don't like anyone. That's driving the city bus. You were smart. I shouldn't have shot myself in the leg. I lost out on that scholarship over that. I wasn't going to serve either in Vietnam." William tells his friend "When Bobby was killed, that was that for me. I knew it was bullshit and I wasn't fighting in a bullshit war." Myrtle walks outside with sweet tea, and smiles "Well look at this. Ward Woods is acting civil." Ward laughs "Myrtle, William and I always got along. We've been friends since integration." Myrtle asks "Should I call your Wife and tell her about this moment?" Ward warns Myrtle "Don't tell her or I won't be able to live it down." Sarah walks on the porch, as William asks Ward "So you married Alberta Washington?" Ward sighs "Yeah. And she drives me crazy. Especially her Mother. She sits behind me every day, and we take shots together when we make stops. She and I get along, though she drives Alberta crazy." Meanwhile in Grandview, Regina arrives at The Veteran's Club, as Ted looks at his Wife, and tells her "Your sorry ass Brother's in town." Regina rolls her eyes, as she sighs in disgust "Daddy would roll in his grave knowing he was back. Sorry bastard." Ted takes another drink, as Regina also orders a beer, as she gripes "Just wait until we get home. Won't be a pleasant reunion. William will be back to wherever he's been before the night's done."
A hour's passed, and Myrtle sits in the den, as William and Sarah sits with her, as William tells his Mother "Dinner was excellent." Myrtle smiles, as she sighs "It was nice." Sarah adds "It's definitely nice without Regina here..." The front door slams open, as Regina and Ted storms inside, and Regina walks into the den, and William quips to his Oldest Sister "Age hasn't been good to you. You look like hell." Myrtle laughs, as Regina yells "Get the hell out of this house you ungrateful bastard!" Sarah stands up, as she glares at Regina, as does Myrtle, as Ted yells "You are a disgrace to America." William looks at Ted, and warns him "From what Sarah's said and Mama, you lied your way into the Veteran's Club of Grandview. And I don't like the fact the two of you live here and take advantage of my Mother!" Regina yells "Daddy hated you. You were too damn selfish and almost broke up our family!" Myrtle yells at Regina "Hold on there! You let me tell you something! I was against that damn war, and every war that's happened since Korea! Don't even start bringing up the past!" Regina asks her Mother "How would Daddy feel knowing he's here?" Myrtle forcefully slaps Regina in the face, and asks "How does that feel Regina? Is that a damn answer for you?" William tells Regina "When I left, you already were working on a divorce from your first Husband, who was drafted, and then divorced him when you met that other guy. Already had two kids." Regina snaps "Shut up!" Sarah stands by William, as Ted yells "You should be arrested!" Sarah yells, defending her Brother "He got that under control." William walks up out of the den, as he yells with disgust "I won't listen to this shit. I came here to see my Mama, and as far as I'm concerned Regina, you can kiss my damn ass!" Ted blocks the doorway, and William warns Ted "Are you testing me?" Ted snarls "Coward." William responds with a right hook, as Regina yells at William "How dare you hit my Teddy Bear!" Sarah and Myrtle stands back, as Myrtle grows furious, and yells loudly "I want everyone in this house to shut the hell up a damn minute before I pull out the damn pepper spray on Regina and Ted!" Regina yells "Mama you are really disrespecting Daddy letting that piece of shit stay in our home." Myrtle snaps at Regina "Your cousin was killed in that damn war for no reason, and I wasn't about to send William off to Vietnam for no reason! And if you want to judge bitch, look at me, I gave him the damn money to flee!" Regina's jaw drops, as Ted looks at Myrtle, and snaps "You are a disgrace too." Sarah slaps Ted in the face, and the door opens, as Ward walks inside, as he grabs Ted, and kicks him off the porch, as Regina yells at Ward "No need for you to be here!" Ward angrily tells Regina "Ain't no damn body about to disrespect my best friend in this house!" Ward tells William "Come over and stay with us." Myrtle hugs her Son, as she looks at Regina, and tells Ward "No Ward, William will be staying here." William tells his Mother "It'd be best Mama." William grabs his suitcase and heads next door to Alberta and Ward's, as Myrtle locks the door behind her, as Ted yells "Let Me In!" and a few moments later Ted yells again, as Ward also delivers a punch and yells "Keep the damn beer cans out of my yard you damn racist!" Back inside, Myrtle yells for Regina to sit down, as Sarah is silent, fuming with anger, as Regina yells at her Mother and Sister "The two of you make me sick!" Myrtle stands in front of Regina, and tells her Daughter in a stern and bold tone "When William got that draft notice, I told him I didn't want him to go because of Bobby. Your Aunt Ira never recovered from that. Jimmy was hellbent on William serving, and we nearly divorced over it, but Jimmy forgave William, and when I got my job at Jones in Downtown, I gave William my first ever paycheck, and Jimmy's check to help him go to Canada. A parent who loves their children will do whatever it takes to save them. Although with you Regina, there were no hope." Regina gasps "You gave Daddy's check to William?" Myrtle snaps "Shut up! You have no room to talk to me about it, and I won't discuss this again. You should be ashamed of yourself, and Ted can sleep out in his truck, if he comes in this house, Ward will kick his ass!" Myrtle storms off to her bedroom, as Sarah looks at her Sister, and tells her "You need to just go get a room." Regina snarks "The hell I will Sarah!" Sarah asks "Want another slap from me? Here's some money! Leave!" Regina storms out, as Sarah walks outside, and heads over to Alberta and Ward's and knocks on the door, as Alberta answers, and tells Sarah "I heard that fight. And Ward Jr's with Amelia so you know." Sarah rolls her eyes, and asks her friend "Where's my Brother?" Alberta walks with Sarah into the basement, as Ward and William sits, and Sarah tells her Brother "I ran Regina off. Please come back home." Ward tells Sarah "He's fine here. We're enjoying my den." Alberta tells her Husband "This is my private salon, not your manhole Ward!" William asks Sarah "How's Mama?" Sarah sighs "She's upset." Alberta and Ward looks at Sarah and William, and tells William "Go back over there. Myrtle doesn't need this." William picks up his suitcase again, as he tells his Sister "You always had my back Sarah." Sarah tells her Brother "And you are my hero William."
Meanwhile back at Myrtle's Home, Myrtle sits in her bedroom, as she has a flashback, and looks at Jimmy's photo, and cries "Jimmy, he came back, but you weren't here. I'm glad you made peace with him, but he needed to know that." Myrtle hears a voice, that says "Tell our Son I love him, and I'm proud of him Myrtle." Myrtle smiles, as she cries "I will do that Jimmy." Myrtle goes to sleep, as Sarah and William sits in the basement, and catch up, as Sarah asks William, pulling out a box "Wanna relax?" William tells Sarah "I'll pass." Sarah lights a joint, as she quips "My relief from Regina." Sarah then catches her Brother up on everything, as Regina and Ted sits in a motel room in Grandview, both fuming.from the fallout earlier. A few days pass, and William prepares to leave to return to his home in Canada, as Myrtle tells her Son "Next time bring my Grandchildren." William hugs his Mother, and Sarah hugs her Brother, as William tells them "I'm moving back to America soon, and when I do, I'll let the two of you know." As William opens the door to leave, Regina stands on the other side, as Myrtle and Sarah both glare, as Regina looks at William, and tells her Brother "I was wrong William. Will you forgive me?" William hugs Regina, and tells his Oldest Sister "I do." William leaves, as Myrtle asks Regina "What changed your opinion?" Regina tells her Mother and Sister "Someone told me to or else I'd have hell to pay." Myrtle, Sarah, and Regina looks over to the wall, at Jimmy's photo, as all of them hold each other for a moment.
Tuesday, August 26, 2014
Life With Myrtle: Season One. Episode 7. Myrtle's Protest
It's morning time at Myrtle's Home, as Sarah reads the paper, and drinks a cup of coffee, as Regina walks outside, and Sarah asks her Oldest Sister "Don't you have a bar to hit in Grandview?" Regina sighs "I have a day off Sarah. I'm resting." Sarah quips "Another first. Do I know you?" Ted walks outside, as he's dressed, and tells his Wife "Well I'm off to work." Sarah asks "And who hired you?" Ted tells his Sister In Law "I'm doing construction work for the new project in Overland Park." Sarah asks "What new project?" Ted responds "A huge shopping center Sarah. Off to work I go." Ted kisses Regina, as he leaves, and Regina smiles "Look at him, he's working. My Teddy bear's got a job." Sarah hands the paper to Regina, and points to the business section, and asks "Could it be this project?" Regina rolls her eyes, and sighs "Oh shit Sarah. Mama was looking for the paper this morning." Sarah whispers "I hid it in the mailbox." Regina quips "Smart move." Meanwhile yelling's heard from Alberta's house, as Amelia runs towards her Grandmother and Great-Aunt in nothing but a tank top and boxers, as Sarah and Regina gets up, and Sarah asks her Granddaughter "Sleepover?" Regina asks her Great-Niece "Did you and Ward Jr have sex? You remind me so much of me." Amelia snarks to her Great Aunt "I don't look like a leather lizard." Sarah asks her Granddaughter "I thought we agreed you and Ward Jr weren't going to have sex?" Amelia sighs "We only watched movies MaMa." Regina laughs "And more. Good girl. Slut in the making." Sarah glares at her Sister, and Regina walks inside laughing, as she laughs "Not in a tank top and a man's boxers." Amelia meanwhile tells her Grandmother "Ward Jr and I were going to Ferguson today to protest." Sarah glares, and reminds Amelia "Didn't I warn you to stop that thought?" Amelia reminds her Grandmother "MaMa it's my duty." Sarah rolls her eyes, and tells her Granddaughter bluntly "We have other things to discuss, and drop the idea!" Amelia whines "But MaMa.." Suddenly Myrtle's Buick flies into the driveway, to a screeching halt, as Mitzi gets out of the passenger's side, and looks up, as Myrtle slams the door, and gripes "Bastards. Damn bastards." Mitzi kisses the ground, and heads home, as Sarah points to the door, as Myrtle looks at her Great-Granddaughter, and asks "So pulling a trick from Regina's book?" Amelia walks inside, as Sarah asks her Mother "You know don't you." Myrtle yells "They are tearing down my mall Sarah! My walking place, where I worked. Greedy ass Sherman sold it! Son of a bitch! You hid this from me." Sarah tells her Mother "Go ask your other Daughter about Ted's job." Myrtle walks inside, as Mitzi yells from her porch "I need a Xanax riding with her!"
Inside, Myrtle walks in, as Regina hears her Mother muttering to herself "City's going to hell in a hand-basket. Damn you Sherman." Regina walks out of the den, and asks her Mother "What's wrong Mama?" Myrtle asks "So what's Ted doing? Sarah told me he got a job?" Regina takes a deep breath, and pulls out her cell phone and tells her Mother "I think I'm going to pick up a few hours." Myrtle asks "Well Regina?" Regina rolls her eyes, and tells her Mother slowly looking down "He's working for the construction company that's about to tear down Overland Shopping Center.." Myrtle is silent, and tells her Daughter "I have shopped at that mall for 45 years, worked at Jones, and now your sorry wino's tearing down my stomping grounds. I want him out of my house." Sarah walks back inside, as Myrtle looks over to Sarah, and tells her "You should have told me before Mitzi and I found the doors locked." Regina responds "Well it's dead anyway, and Supermart's perfect!" Myrtle yells "You make me sick!" Myrtle storms out, as Sarah tells her Sister "I'm going to the college to finish that exam. Mama handled it as I figured she would." Regina sighs "Well I'm leaving too. I just don't hope Mama doesn't have a stroke over this." Sarah responds "Amelia's in my room right now getting dressed, and well, Mama can deal with her." As Sarah gets to the door, she turns to her Sister, and tells her "Regina, if I were you, I'd sleep with my eyes open." Sarah leaves, as Regina quickly flees the house, as she heads to Pancake King, sending Ted a text, warning him "Call me before you head home. Mama wants to kill you." Meanwhile, Amelia gets dressed, and walks out of Sarah's bedroom, as she notices the silence, and calls Ward Jr, as she tells her boyfriend "Please bring me my clothes, and and keep a lookout for my MaMa and Grandma."
An hour later, Myrtle slams the door, as she walks back inside, as she mutters "Parkway Mall's too damn small since they butchered it to be a strip mall Mitzi, and Quivira Park's too damn large." Amelia sits in the den, as Myrtle asks her Great-Granddaughter "Where's Sarah and Regina?" Amelia answers "They left." Myrtle tells Amelia "Well why didn't you follow, or are you waiting for Ward to leave so you and Little Ward can fool around?" Amelia tells her Great-Grandmother "I know you're upset about Overland's closing." Myrtle nods, and asks her Great-Granddaughter "And are you excited Supermart's opening there instead as well?" Amelia sighs "I don't really care Grandma, but if you have a problem, one solution, protest it." Myrtle looks at Amelia, and strokes her hair, and smiles "That idea's brilliant. Sometimes I really underestimate you." Amelia asks "And what does that mean?" Myrtle quips "From this morning I was terrified you were turning into Regina 2.0." Amelia jokes "Mitzi's Grandson is cute." Myrtle sighs "Focus Amelia focus. We don't spend enough time together, and I have an idea on how we can spend some time together. We're going down to the mall. You want to have a riot anyway. And Grandmas let their Grandchildren have their way, if Jenny had lived, Sarah'd be much nicer, but hell I still have a key to the mall." Myrtle chuckles, as Amelia rolls her eyes, and there's a knock on the door, as Mitzi walks inside, and Myrtle asks Mitzi "Care to go with us down for one last walk at the mall?" Mitzi asks Myrtle "Are you crazy?" Myrtle answers "You are close to it, but I'm thinking clearly." Mitzi warns them "The two of you will get arrested, and Sarah will flip her lid." Myrtle responds "I don't give two shits what my children think. I'm having my protest!" Mitzi sighs, and walks out, as Myrtle tells Amelia "Time to go across the state line." Amelia asks "Shouldn't I drive?" Myrtle tells Amelia "Just drive your SUV, and follow me."
As evening arrives, Sarah returns home from Longview College, as she hears Regina and Ted arguing in the den, as Regina yells "Just one damn day and you got fired!" Ted slurs, as he's buzzed "Well it's your fault!" Regina warns her Husband "Don't start with me again Ted!" Sarah asks sarcastically "I hate to break this loving argument up, but where's my Mama and my Granddaughter." Regina snaps "Who cares? This asshole can't hold a job." Sarah quips "But he can sure hold his beer can't he?" Sarah walks around the house, and calls Mitzi, and Mitzi tells Sarah "I don't know where she went, but she flew out of the driveway, and so did Amelia." Sarah yells "DAMNIT!" Regina walks inside the kitchen, as she asks "Did you go over to Alberta's and check Ward Jr's bedroom?" Sarah yells at Regina "Amelia's not there. But I think I know where she and Mama went." At Overland Shopping Center, Myrtle parks her Buick, as Amelia parks her SUV at the entrance to the former Jones Store, as Myrtle tells her Great-Granddaughter "Enjoy the dinner?" Amelia sighs, as her phone rings "MaMa's calling." Myrtle tells Amelia "Ignore her, we have business to tend to." They head to the door, as Myrtle laughs "May have laid me off, but Sherman was always lazy about updates." Myrtle unlocks the door, as they get inside the mall, and notice the plants removed, and the gate open to Jones, as Amelia asks "We're looting aren't we?" Myrtle smiles "No. I'm going down memory lane. That fountain used to be where I sat and smoked on my breaks when Alberta and I wasn't playing with my hair. That former book store was Jimmy's favorite place. Mine too, and Sarah's." Amelia and Myrtle walks inside the former Jones, as Myrtle cries "I used to do your Uncle Robin's makeup at that counter. He loved to play dress up." Myrtle then looks around, and sighs "This was the first enclosed mall built in Metro Kansas City, and always my playground. Now look at this. A damn Supermart's about to replace this palace." Amelia sighs "Quivira Park's nicer." Myrtle asks "Wanna get slapped. Now start getting things to put into the SUV, and here's a key to the ground entrance." Meanwhile a security guard drives around the mall, and notices Myrtle and Amelia's vehicles, and notices Amelia carrying a box, with Myrtle behind her, and calls the police.
A few hours later, Myrtle and Amelia sits inside a jail cell together at the Overland Park Police Department, as Amelia tells her Great-Grandmother "Well I called Alberta, and she and Ward were busy." Myrtle responds "Well they are doing the same thing you like to do with their Son, but it's ok." Amelia asks "Are you calling MaMa?" Myrtle sighs "I called Mitzi, and she likely's told her." The jailer walks inside, and tells Amelia and Myrtle "The two of you have a visitor." Sarah walks inside, as disgust shows on her face, as she looks at her Mother, and Granddaughter, and tells them with anger in her tone "I talked to Mr.Sherman, and luckily he's not pressing charges. And he said you could keep the keepsakes." Myrtle responds "Mighty kind of the jackass." Sarah then turns towards Amelia, as she asks "So did you put Mama up to this?" Amelia asks "Well are you going to let us out MaMa?" Sarah snaps "Amelia Jean Carr, you were so damn hellbent on going to Ferguson, and I asked you what would it accomplish, and forbid it, and so you know, Alberta and Ward forbid Ward Jr also. She told me when she got her clothes on and came over after getting your call from here." Sarah asks her Mother "And what exactly did this stunt accomplish for you Mama?" Myrtle smiles "I got my pin from the office." Sarah reminds Myrtle "It's in your damn jewelry box!" Myrtle yells "That place holds special memories for me Sarah. I worked there, shopped there. You worked there too, and Jimmy and I walked there every day. Tearing it down is like ripping a hole in my heart." Sarah looks at the jailer, and tells him "Let them out." Sarah puts her arm around her Mother, and tells her gently "I know Overland Shopping Center holds memories for you, but Mr.Sherman told me he would let you go back tomorrow for one last tour and I'm going with you. The only condition." Amelia asks her Grandmother "And how about me?" Sarah looks at Amelia, and hugs her, and smiles "I'm kicking your ass. You go back to your apartment, and I better not see you streaking out of Alberta's home again!" Amelia reminds her Grandmother "I'm not a little girl." Sarah responds "And I'm not going to let you turn into another Regina." Myrtle yells "Let's go home!" Sarah, Myrtle, and Amelia leaves.
It's the next morning, and Sarah sits on the porch, as she drinks coffee, as Regina walks out, and tells her Sister "Well Ted's in Grandview, and I'm off to work." Sarah nods, as Regina leaves, and Myrtle and Mitzi returns, as Myrtle tells Mitzi "I don't like Parkway Mall. Too many people." Mitzi reminds Myrtle "Not many choices left." Myrtle snarls "They have turned the damn place into a yuppie convention and cut the mall up." Sarah smiles "Well at least you have a place to go now to walk." Mitzi nods, as Myrtle tells Sarah "Aren't we going to Overland one last time." Sarah nods as she rolls her eyes "Yes Mama. We're about to leave now." Mitzi heads back home, as Sarah hears yelling from Alberta's house, as Ward yells "Get your half-breeded ass the hell out of my house girl!" Amelia runs from the basement, in Ward Jr's t-shirt, as Sarah and Myrtle rolls their eyes, and Myrtle whispers "The way things look, you may want to go down to Fabric House and make a quilt." Sarah responds "I think I'll just lock her in her apartment instead."
Inside, Myrtle walks in, as Regina hears her Mother muttering to herself "City's going to hell in a hand-basket. Damn you Sherman." Regina walks out of the den, and asks her Mother "What's wrong Mama?" Myrtle asks "So what's Ted doing? Sarah told me he got a job?" Regina takes a deep breath, and pulls out her cell phone and tells her Mother "I think I'm going to pick up a few hours." Myrtle asks "Well Regina?" Regina rolls her eyes, and tells her Mother slowly looking down "He's working for the construction company that's about to tear down Overland Shopping Center.." Myrtle is silent, and tells her Daughter "I have shopped at that mall for 45 years, worked at Jones, and now your sorry wino's tearing down my stomping grounds. I want him out of my house." Sarah walks back inside, as Myrtle looks over to Sarah, and tells her "You should have told me before Mitzi and I found the doors locked." Regina responds "Well it's dead anyway, and Supermart's perfect!" Myrtle yells "You make me sick!" Myrtle storms out, as Sarah tells her Sister "I'm going to the college to finish that exam. Mama handled it as I figured she would." Regina sighs "Well I'm leaving too. I just don't hope Mama doesn't have a stroke over this." Sarah responds "Amelia's in my room right now getting dressed, and well, Mama can deal with her." As Sarah gets to the door, she turns to her Sister, and tells her "Regina, if I were you, I'd sleep with my eyes open." Sarah leaves, as Regina quickly flees the house, as she heads to Pancake King, sending Ted a text, warning him "Call me before you head home. Mama wants to kill you." Meanwhile, Amelia gets dressed, and walks out of Sarah's bedroom, as she notices the silence, and calls Ward Jr, as she tells her boyfriend "Please bring me my clothes, and and keep a lookout for my MaMa and Grandma."
An hour later, Myrtle slams the door, as she walks back inside, as she mutters "Parkway Mall's too damn small since they butchered it to be a strip mall Mitzi, and Quivira Park's too damn large." Amelia sits in the den, as Myrtle asks her Great-Granddaughter "Where's Sarah and Regina?" Amelia answers "They left." Myrtle tells Amelia "Well why didn't you follow, or are you waiting for Ward to leave so you and Little Ward can fool around?" Amelia tells her Great-Grandmother "I know you're upset about Overland's closing." Myrtle nods, and asks her Great-Granddaughter "And are you excited Supermart's opening there instead as well?" Amelia sighs "I don't really care Grandma, but if you have a problem, one solution, protest it." Myrtle looks at Amelia, and strokes her hair, and smiles "That idea's brilliant. Sometimes I really underestimate you." Amelia asks "And what does that mean?" Myrtle quips "From this morning I was terrified you were turning into Regina 2.0." Amelia jokes "Mitzi's Grandson is cute." Myrtle sighs "Focus Amelia focus. We don't spend enough time together, and I have an idea on how we can spend some time together. We're going down to the mall. You want to have a riot anyway. And Grandmas let their Grandchildren have their way, if Jenny had lived, Sarah'd be much nicer, but hell I still have a key to the mall." Myrtle chuckles, as Amelia rolls her eyes, and there's a knock on the door, as Mitzi walks inside, and Myrtle asks Mitzi "Care to go with us down for one last walk at the mall?" Mitzi asks Myrtle "Are you crazy?" Myrtle answers "You are close to it, but I'm thinking clearly." Mitzi warns them "The two of you will get arrested, and Sarah will flip her lid." Myrtle responds "I don't give two shits what my children think. I'm having my protest!" Mitzi sighs, and walks out, as Myrtle tells Amelia "Time to go across the state line." Amelia asks "Shouldn't I drive?" Myrtle tells Amelia "Just drive your SUV, and follow me."
As evening arrives, Sarah returns home from Longview College, as she hears Regina and Ted arguing in the den, as Regina yells "Just one damn day and you got fired!" Ted slurs, as he's buzzed "Well it's your fault!" Regina warns her Husband "Don't start with me again Ted!" Sarah asks sarcastically "I hate to break this loving argument up, but where's my Mama and my Granddaughter." Regina snaps "Who cares? This asshole can't hold a job." Sarah quips "But he can sure hold his beer can't he?" Sarah walks around the house, and calls Mitzi, and Mitzi tells Sarah "I don't know where she went, but she flew out of the driveway, and so did Amelia." Sarah yells "DAMNIT!" Regina walks inside the kitchen, as she asks "Did you go over to Alberta's and check Ward Jr's bedroom?" Sarah yells at Regina "Amelia's not there. But I think I know where she and Mama went." At Overland Shopping Center, Myrtle parks her Buick, as Amelia parks her SUV at the entrance to the former Jones Store, as Myrtle tells her Great-Granddaughter "Enjoy the dinner?" Amelia sighs, as her phone rings "MaMa's calling." Myrtle tells Amelia "Ignore her, we have business to tend to." They head to the door, as Myrtle laughs "May have laid me off, but Sherman was always lazy about updates." Myrtle unlocks the door, as they get inside the mall, and notice the plants removed, and the gate open to Jones, as Amelia asks "We're looting aren't we?" Myrtle smiles "No. I'm going down memory lane. That fountain used to be where I sat and smoked on my breaks when Alberta and I wasn't playing with my hair. That former book store was Jimmy's favorite place. Mine too, and Sarah's." Amelia and Myrtle walks inside the former Jones, as Myrtle cries "I used to do your Uncle Robin's makeup at that counter. He loved to play dress up." Myrtle then looks around, and sighs "This was the first enclosed mall built in Metro Kansas City, and always my playground. Now look at this. A damn Supermart's about to replace this palace." Amelia sighs "Quivira Park's nicer." Myrtle asks "Wanna get slapped. Now start getting things to put into the SUV, and here's a key to the ground entrance." Meanwhile a security guard drives around the mall, and notices Myrtle and Amelia's vehicles, and notices Amelia carrying a box, with Myrtle behind her, and calls the police.
A few hours later, Myrtle and Amelia sits inside a jail cell together at the Overland Park Police Department, as Amelia tells her Great-Grandmother "Well I called Alberta, and she and Ward were busy." Myrtle responds "Well they are doing the same thing you like to do with their Son, but it's ok." Amelia asks "Are you calling MaMa?" Myrtle sighs "I called Mitzi, and she likely's told her." The jailer walks inside, and tells Amelia and Myrtle "The two of you have a visitor." Sarah walks inside, as disgust shows on her face, as she looks at her Mother, and Granddaughter, and tells them with anger in her tone "I talked to Mr.Sherman, and luckily he's not pressing charges. And he said you could keep the keepsakes." Myrtle responds "Mighty kind of the jackass." Sarah then turns towards Amelia, as she asks "So did you put Mama up to this?" Amelia asks "Well are you going to let us out MaMa?" Sarah snaps "Amelia Jean Carr, you were so damn hellbent on going to Ferguson, and I asked you what would it accomplish, and forbid it, and so you know, Alberta and Ward forbid Ward Jr also. She told me when she got her clothes on and came over after getting your call from here." Sarah asks her Mother "And what exactly did this stunt accomplish for you Mama?" Myrtle smiles "I got my pin from the office." Sarah reminds Myrtle "It's in your damn jewelry box!" Myrtle yells "That place holds special memories for me Sarah. I worked there, shopped there. You worked there too, and Jimmy and I walked there every day. Tearing it down is like ripping a hole in my heart." Sarah looks at the jailer, and tells him "Let them out." Sarah puts her arm around her Mother, and tells her gently "I know Overland Shopping Center holds memories for you, but Mr.Sherman told me he would let you go back tomorrow for one last tour and I'm going with you. The only condition." Amelia asks her Grandmother "And how about me?" Sarah looks at Amelia, and hugs her, and smiles "I'm kicking your ass. You go back to your apartment, and I better not see you streaking out of Alberta's home again!" Amelia reminds her Grandmother "I'm not a little girl." Sarah responds "And I'm not going to let you turn into another Regina." Myrtle yells "Let's go home!" Sarah, Myrtle, and Amelia leaves.
It's the next morning, and Sarah sits on the porch, as she drinks coffee, as Regina walks out, and tells her Sister "Well Ted's in Grandview, and I'm off to work." Sarah nods, as Regina leaves, and Myrtle and Mitzi returns, as Myrtle tells Mitzi "I don't like Parkway Mall. Too many people." Mitzi reminds Myrtle "Not many choices left." Myrtle snarls "They have turned the damn place into a yuppie convention and cut the mall up." Sarah smiles "Well at least you have a place to go now to walk." Mitzi nods, as Myrtle tells Sarah "Aren't we going to Overland one last time." Sarah nods as she rolls her eyes "Yes Mama. We're about to leave now." Mitzi heads back home, as Sarah hears yelling from Alberta's house, as Ward yells "Get your half-breeded ass the hell out of my house girl!" Amelia runs from the basement, in Ward Jr's t-shirt, as Sarah and Myrtle rolls their eyes, and Myrtle whispers "The way things look, you may want to go down to Fabric House and make a quilt." Sarah responds "I think I'll just lock her in her apartment instead."
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
Life With Myrtle: Season One. Episode 6. Myrtle Faces The Past: Part Two
One week later...
At Myrtle's Home, Mitzi and Alberta sits outside on the porch, as Sarah walks outside to join them, as Mitzi asks Sarah "How's Myrtle?" Sarah sighs "Mama hasn't been herself since Aunt Betty had her stroke. She's stayed in her room, and I'm worried about her." Alberta tells Mitzi and Sarah "She's never done this before." Mitzi tells Alberta "Myrtle and her family have never been very close. Betty Zane and her were the closest, and when Jimmy died, she was like this, but I was able to pull her out of it." Sarah tells them "Mama thinks this is her fault, and I've tried talking to her, but she told me to sit on a hot coal." Mitzi and Alberta asks Sarah "Has she considered going down to Georgia to visit?" Sarah sighs "As long as Aunt Cora's alive, Mama vowed to never return. When Grandpa Caney passed in 1982, Mama and Aunt Cora got into a huge fight in the middle of the church, and.." Myrtle walks outside, in her housecoat, and tells everyone "Leave me alone. Just go back home, and leave me alone." Sarah tells her Mother "Mama, Mitzi and Alberta wanted to cheer you up. I've spoken to Aunt Betty's Daughter's, and she's recovering.." Myrtle yells "She had a damn stroke Sarah! I caused it, and now if all of you excuse me, I'm going inside, and LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!" Myrtle slams the door, as Mitzi and Alberta both offers support, and Sarah tells them "I think it's time Mama goes to Georgia." Alberta heads to her home on the left side of Myrtle's house, as Mitzi heads back to her home, and Alberta yells at a mover "Don't break that!" Sarah walks back inside, as Myrtle sits at the kitchen table, and Myrtle tells her Daughter "Sarah, I've been thinking." Sarah nods, and adds "I think we need to go to Georgia Mama." Myrtle looks at her Daughter, and tells her "I snuck out last night, and won $2500, and I'm going alone." Sarah looks at her Mother, and tells her "Mama you need me to go with you, or Regina.." Myrtle gets up, and tells Sarah "Hell no! I already have enough problems leaving knowing Regina and that wino's here. You keep an eye on the place. My plane leaves tonight." Sarah reminds her "You're going down there to support Aunt Betty and her family. Not to kill Aunt Cora." Myrtle quips "The airline wouldn't let me carry my pistol with me Sarah, and if I see the wicked bitch, I'll tell her you said hello." Myrtle heads back to her bedroom, as Sarah makes a phone call to her Cousin in Georgia, and tells her "Mama's on her way. Might want to warn Aunt Cora."
Evening has arrived, as Sarah returns from the airport, as Regina and Ted lays on the pull out bed in the den, as Sarah yells "Put on some damn clothes! Damn I feel sick!" Regina and Ted pulls the blanket up over them, as Regina asks her Sister "So Mama's gone?" Sarah sighs "After arguing with the security for an hour, and slapping the guard for touching her, they let her on the plane." Ted quips "I think that old bat needs to be in a home. Last night she sprayed me when I came home." Sarah defiantly reminds Ted "This isn't your home Ted. This is Mama's and she's been through a lot, and you and Regina arguing isn't helping. Now I'm in charge, and you don't want to push me. You'll have more issues besides being impotent." Regina asks Sarah "Well why are you in charge? I'm the Oldest! And I have a job?" Ted responds "About your job.." Regina yells "Shut up Ted!" Sarah tells her Sister 'I'm the only one in this house with brains as Mama puts it nicely. Mitzi and Alberta's also watching the place. So don't pull nothing!" Sarah heads to her bedroom, as Ted reminds his Wife "Well now you have a reason to quit that damn job! You can be the housewife you're meant to be!" Regina tells her Husband "Put on your underwear and shut up." Meanwhile on an airplane, as the pilot tells everyone "We're getting close to Atlanta. We'll be landing shortly." Myrtle sits by the window, as the person sitting next to her asks "Have you ever been to Georgia?" Myrtle sarcastically responds "No. I live a sheltered life. I grew up there!" The man sighs "Damn you don't have to get testy." Myrtle adds "And I'm not interested in giving you pleasure in the lavatory so stop looking me up and down!" The man looks around the plane, as he asks another woman "Ever been to Georgia?", as the pilot tells the passengers "We're now circling, and making our approach.." Myrtle yells "Just land the damn thing!" 30 minutes later, Myrtle's flight has landed, and as everyone gets off the plane, the stewardess tells them "Thank you for flying Alta Airlines. Myrtle walks by, and the stewardess asks "Need help or need me to call for a wheelchair?" Myrtle stares at the stewardess, and asks "Wanna get slapped? I can function just fine you slut." The stewardess steps back and responds "Just doing my job ma'am." Myrtle responds "If taking the man next to me to the lavatory's a job, then you need to be fired." Myrtle walks to the baggage claim, as the stewardess rolls her eyes.
It's the next morning, and Myrtle has arrived in Carrollton Georgia, and sits in her motel room, as she hears yelling in the room next to her, as Myrtle sighs "Thank God my Grandchildren are grown." Myrtle walks out of her room and looks towards the room with a glare, as she says to herself "And now off to see Betty." Myrtle gets into her rental car, as she drives towards the rehab facility where her Sister's presently residing after suffering her stroke. A few minutes later, at the Rehab Facility, Betty Zane's in her room, as her Husband Fred, Oldest Sister Cora, and Betty Zane and Fred's Youngest Daughter, and Adopted Daughter sits by her side, as Cora preaches, and Betty Zane looks towards her Husband, as Fred stares at Cora, as Cora talks loudly "Remember when Daddy read us the bible every night before bed?" Betty Zane's Daughters walks outside, as youngest Daughter, Anna, tells her close friend, and Adopted member of Betty Zane's family, Piper "Aunt Cora's really making Mother uneasy." Piper sighs "She won't leave. Earlier she was telling the staff how to give Z therapy until Fred told her to leave." Anna sighs, as she glances down the hall, as Myrtle heads towards them, and Anna exclaims "Aunt Myrtle!" Myrtle hugs her Niece, and looks at Piper, and asks "Is this Lynne? Did she get plastic surgery?" Anna laughs "No Aunt Myrtle, this is Piper. She's my best friend and Mother's "fourth" Daughter." Piper welcomes Myrtle with a hug, as Myrtle asks "How's Betty? I hear a dog howling in her room. Need me to call the dog pound?" Anna sighs "Aunt Myrtle, just keep your calm. We've tried everything, and she won't leave." Myrtle quips "One of you go buy her a muzzle." Myrtle walks into her Sister's room, as Betty Zane turns, and starts to cry, as Cora yells "Grandma Slut has arrived! You're not welcome here!" Fred greets his Sister In Law with a hug, as he tells Myrtle "Greetings. You and Betty both look just alike." Myrtle looks at Betty Zane, and smiles "We did take after each other in the looks department." Anna and Piper walks inside, as Cora tells her Niece and Piper "I don't want Myrtle here." Betty Zane points her right finger to Myrtle, as Myrtle asks "Who's the fat dalmatian in the room?" Cora hatefully responds "Excuse me? What did you call me?" Betty Zane cracks a smile, as Fred tells his Daughters quietly "I think my Z's happy Myrtle's here." Betty Zane tells them, as her speech's slurred due to the stroke "Take your Aunt to the farm." Myrtle meanwhile looks at Cora, and goes "Wow! A wig! So many liver-spots I'm surprised the dog pound hasn't mistook you for a stray bitch." Cora yells "Who in the hell do you think you're talking to you old slut?" Meanwhile the nurses arrive, as Betty Zane's taken to therapy, and the nurse hears the arguing behind the curtain, and a slap, as she asks "What's going on?" Betty Zane responds with a look of peace "A family reunion." Fred tells Anna and Piper "Go with Z, and I'll break up this reunion." Betty Zane's rolled to therapy, as Fred asks Myrtle "Z told me to take you down to the farm and to pick a room." Cora asks Fred "Are you out of your mind?" Fred ignores Cora, as Fred asks Myrtle "How's Sarah and Regina doing?" Cora tells her Brother In Law "Both living as sinners like their Mama. Queen Slut the first. The Caney family disgrace.." Myrtle warns Cora "If you don't shut your damn mouth, you'll be in here plugged to a machine. I'll even move back to play with the cord." Fred sighs "Let us go down to the farm, and you can get comfortable Myrtle." Cora asks Fred "Aren't you scared she will try and seduce you?" Myrtle and Fred heads out, as Cora shakes her head with disgust, as Fred tells the nurses "Tell my Zzie I'll be back for dinner." Fred and Myrtle heads to the Caney farm, at the Carroll County line.
It's evening, and at Betty Zane and Fred's farm, The Caney Farm, Myrtle and Fred sits in the kitchen, as Myrtle tells her Brother In Law "Don't tell Betty I cooked chicken." Fred tells Myrtle "She's happy you're here. The girls are too. And I won't say anything about your fine dinner." Myrtle whispers "I know she's health-conscious, but.." Fred stops Myrtle, and gently says "It's been lonely coming home each evening without her. But she'll be home soon and I know she will. She's tough." Myrtle nods "She certainly is." Myrtle tells Fred, changing subjects "The two of you did a great job on the home place. I even seen where Betty left all of our names in the wall in the sun room. From the Oldest, to me." Fred laughs "Even where you scratched over Cora's name also." Myrtle sighs "I can't stand her." Fred sighs "We try to love everybody, especially Z, she's always so outgoing." Myrtle tells Fred "The two of you did an excellent job raising your girls, and Mama and Daddy would have been proud of y'all. All these years in Kansas City, and coming down here, and the accent kicks back into high gear." Fred laughs, as he looks at the clock, and tells Myrtle "Our maid fixed your room up for you. We'll go see my Z in the morning." Myrtle heads to the guest room, as she sits on the edge of the bed, as she has flashbacks to her childhood, and sighs "It still feels like home."
The next day, Myrtle and Fred arrives at the Rehab Facility, as Cora waits outside Betty Zane's door, and snarks "So having an affair on my Sister are you Fred?" Fred warns Cora "I really think you need to stop with this. Myrtle's nothing like you say she is, and I think you need to leave." Cora snides "Well your Daughters aren't here." Fred responds "They work Cora." Myrtle adds "Don't you have an appointment at the makeup counter?" Cora snaps at Myrtle "Nobody wanted to see you return! You are nothing but an embarrassment to our family. Your two Daughters were nothing but sluts, and your Son, a worthless loser, and your Grandchildren..." Myrtle stops her Sister boldly, and yells "Shut your old decrepit-ed ass up. I've had enough." Myrtle pulls Cora's wig off, as Anna arrives, and Cora yells at Myrtle "Don't you dare." Myrtle takes Cora into an empty room, and locks the door, as Myrtle looks at Cora, and goes "Ok. Now I see why I stopped having perms. You are nothing but a holier than thou hypocrite that does nothing but judge others, and gets enjoyment from trying to control people's lives, and I won't watch you do that to Betty, or her family. You've worn out your welcome." Cora yells at her Sister "You have no room to talk. You got pregnant and wasn't married. You hurt our family." Myrtle bluntly reminds Cora "Mama and Daddy were good people, and once they met Jimmy, they adored him. He and Fred were friends, and even your dear Edgar liked him." Cora snaps "The hell he did." Myrtle asks "So since we're opening up Cora, why did you change your last name back to Caney?" Cora snaps "Because someone worthy needed to keep the family name alive. And I'm worthy! Why don't you go back to your house of sin Myrtle?" Myrtle tells her Oldest Sister "Edgar had enough and divorced you after 50 years, and your kids want nothing to do with you. I talk to Edie, and.." Cora snaps "Don't judge me!" Myrtle tells Cora "I'm stating mere facts, and the fact is, you like to preach, but you don't follow your sermons. You alienated your family, because you are nothing but a bitter old woman with nothing else to do. My life was never perfect, but I wouldn't change a damn thing. And maybe you should go look in the mirror, and let our Sister heal in peace. And here's your damn 5 dollar wig." Myrtle walks out of the room, as Cora fumes, and leaves the Rehab Facility, as Myrtle walks inside Betty Zane's room, as Betty Zane moves her left arm on her own, and her left foot, as Anna hugs her Father, and Myrtle starts to cry, as Betty Zane tells her Sister "Now stop that Myrtle." Anna starts to cry as well, as Betty Zane defiantly exclaims "The lord is healing me!" Myrtle smiles "The Caney fire still burns, and it's burning madly now." Betty Zane gently tells her Sister "All I needed was the Lord, and my family, and I'm going nowhere yet!" Betty Zane and Myrtle hugs, as Fred and Anna watches on, both crying tears of joy.
A week later, in South Kansas City, Myrtle returns home, as Sarah sits in the kitchen, as Myrtle walks into the kitchen, and tells her Daughter "I'm home." Sarah hugs her Mother, and ask "How's Aunt Betty?" Myrtle smiles, as she responds "She went back home yesterday, and walked out of the Rehab Facility, with a cane, but she's going to be just fine." Sarah laughs "I heard you let Aunt Cora have it while you were there." Myrtle laughs "Damn straight I did, and I finally made peace with everything. How were things here?" Sarah sighs "Actually smoothly, normal." Myrtle walks around the house, as she returns to the kitchen, and tells her Daughter "Well at least everything was where it was when I left." Sarah and Myrtle hug, as they celebrate Betty Zane's miraculous recovery from her stroke.
(Dedicated with love to Betty Zane Waters, and The Waters Family)
At Myrtle's Home, Mitzi and Alberta sits outside on the porch, as Sarah walks outside to join them, as Mitzi asks Sarah "How's Myrtle?" Sarah sighs "Mama hasn't been herself since Aunt Betty had her stroke. She's stayed in her room, and I'm worried about her." Alberta tells Mitzi and Sarah "She's never done this before." Mitzi tells Alberta "Myrtle and her family have never been very close. Betty Zane and her were the closest, and when Jimmy died, she was like this, but I was able to pull her out of it." Sarah tells them "Mama thinks this is her fault, and I've tried talking to her, but she told me to sit on a hot coal." Mitzi and Alberta asks Sarah "Has she considered going down to Georgia to visit?" Sarah sighs "As long as Aunt Cora's alive, Mama vowed to never return. When Grandpa Caney passed in 1982, Mama and Aunt Cora got into a huge fight in the middle of the church, and.." Myrtle walks outside, in her housecoat, and tells everyone "Leave me alone. Just go back home, and leave me alone." Sarah tells her Mother "Mama, Mitzi and Alberta wanted to cheer you up. I've spoken to Aunt Betty's Daughter's, and she's recovering.." Myrtle yells "She had a damn stroke Sarah! I caused it, and now if all of you excuse me, I'm going inside, and LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!" Myrtle slams the door, as Mitzi and Alberta both offers support, and Sarah tells them "I think it's time Mama goes to Georgia." Alberta heads to her home on the left side of Myrtle's house, as Mitzi heads back to her home, and Alberta yells at a mover "Don't break that!" Sarah walks back inside, as Myrtle sits at the kitchen table, and Myrtle tells her Daughter "Sarah, I've been thinking." Sarah nods, and adds "I think we need to go to Georgia Mama." Myrtle looks at her Daughter, and tells her "I snuck out last night, and won $2500, and I'm going alone." Sarah looks at her Mother, and tells her "Mama you need me to go with you, or Regina.." Myrtle gets up, and tells Sarah "Hell no! I already have enough problems leaving knowing Regina and that wino's here. You keep an eye on the place. My plane leaves tonight." Sarah reminds her "You're going down there to support Aunt Betty and her family. Not to kill Aunt Cora." Myrtle quips "The airline wouldn't let me carry my pistol with me Sarah, and if I see the wicked bitch, I'll tell her you said hello." Myrtle heads back to her bedroom, as Sarah makes a phone call to her Cousin in Georgia, and tells her "Mama's on her way. Might want to warn Aunt Cora."
Evening has arrived, as Sarah returns from the airport, as Regina and Ted lays on the pull out bed in the den, as Sarah yells "Put on some damn clothes! Damn I feel sick!" Regina and Ted pulls the blanket up over them, as Regina asks her Sister "So Mama's gone?" Sarah sighs "After arguing with the security for an hour, and slapping the guard for touching her, they let her on the plane." Ted quips "I think that old bat needs to be in a home. Last night she sprayed me when I came home." Sarah defiantly reminds Ted "This isn't your home Ted. This is Mama's and she's been through a lot, and you and Regina arguing isn't helping. Now I'm in charge, and you don't want to push me. You'll have more issues besides being impotent." Regina asks Sarah "Well why are you in charge? I'm the Oldest! And I have a job?" Ted responds "About your job.." Regina yells "Shut up Ted!" Sarah tells her Sister 'I'm the only one in this house with brains as Mama puts it nicely. Mitzi and Alberta's also watching the place. So don't pull nothing!" Sarah heads to her bedroom, as Ted reminds his Wife "Well now you have a reason to quit that damn job! You can be the housewife you're meant to be!" Regina tells her Husband "Put on your underwear and shut up." Meanwhile on an airplane, as the pilot tells everyone "We're getting close to Atlanta. We'll be landing shortly." Myrtle sits by the window, as the person sitting next to her asks "Have you ever been to Georgia?" Myrtle sarcastically responds "No. I live a sheltered life. I grew up there!" The man sighs "Damn you don't have to get testy." Myrtle adds "And I'm not interested in giving you pleasure in the lavatory so stop looking me up and down!" The man looks around the plane, as he asks another woman "Ever been to Georgia?", as the pilot tells the passengers "We're now circling, and making our approach.." Myrtle yells "Just land the damn thing!" 30 minutes later, Myrtle's flight has landed, and as everyone gets off the plane, the stewardess tells them "Thank you for flying Alta Airlines. Myrtle walks by, and the stewardess asks "Need help or need me to call for a wheelchair?" Myrtle stares at the stewardess, and asks "Wanna get slapped? I can function just fine you slut." The stewardess steps back and responds "Just doing my job ma'am." Myrtle responds "If taking the man next to me to the lavatory's a job, then you need to be fired." Myrtle walks to the baggage claim, as the stewardess rolls her eyes.
It's the next morning, and Myrtle has arrived in Carrollton Georgia, and sits in her motel room, as she hears yelling in the room next to her, as Myrtle sighs "Thank God my Grandchildren are grown." Myrtle walks out of her room and looks towards the room with a glare, as she says to herself "And now off to see Betty." Myrtle gets into her rental car, as she drives towards the rehab facility where her Sister's presently residing after suffering her stroke. A few minutes later, at the Rehab Facility, Betty Zane's in her room, as her Husband Fred, Oldest Sister Cora, and Betty Zane and Fred's Youngest Daughter, and Adopted Daughter sits by her side, as Cora preaches, and Betty Zane looks towards her Husband, as Fred stares at Cora, as Cora talks loudly "Remember when Daddy read us the bible every night before bed?" Betty Zane's Daughters walks outside, as youngest Daughter, Anna, tells her close friend, and Adopted member of Betty Zane's family, Piper "Aunt Cora's really making Mother uneasy." Piper sighs "She won't leave. Earlier she was telling the staff how to give Z therapy until Fred told her to leave." Anna sighs, as she glances down the hall, as Myrtle heads towards them, and Anna exclaims "Aunt Myrtle!" Myrtle hugs her Niece, and looks at Piper, and asks "Is this Lynne? Did she get plastic surgery?" Anna laughs "No Aunt Myrtle, this is Piper. She's my best friend and Mother's "fourth" Daughter." Piper welcomes Myrtle with a hug, as Myrtle asks "How's Betty? I hear a dog howling in her room. Need me to call the dog pound?" Anna sighs "Aunt Myrtle, just keep your calm. We've tried everything, and she won't leave." Myrtle quips "One of you go buy her a muzzle." Myrtle walks into her Sister's room, as Betty Zane turns, and starts to cry, as Cora yells "Grandma Slut has arrived! You're not welcome here!" Fred greets his Sister In Law with a hug, as he tells Myrtle "Greetings. You and Betty both look just alike." Myrtle looks at Betty Zane, and smiles "We did take after each other in the looks department." Anna and Piper walks inside, as Cora tells her Niece and Piper "I don't want Myrtle here." Betty Zane points her right finger to Myrtle, as Myrtle asks "Who's the fat dalmatian in the room?" Cora hatefully responds "Excuse me? What did you call me?" Betty Zane cracks a smile, as Fred tells his Daughters quietly "I think my Z's happy Myrtle's here." Betty Zane tells them, as her speech's slurred due to the stroke "Take your Aunt to the farm." Myrtle meanwhile looks at Cora, and goes "Wow! A wig! So many liver-spots I'm surprised the dog pound hasn't mistook you for a stray bitch." Cora yells "Who in the hell do you think you're talking to you old slut?" Meanwhile the nurses arrive, as Betty Zane's taken to therapy, and the nurse hears the arguing behind the curtain, and a slap, as she asks "What's going on?" Betty Zane responds with a look of peace "A family reunion." Fred tells Anna and Piper "Go with Z, and I'll break up this reunion." Betty Zane's rolled to therapy, as Fred asks Myrtle "Z told me to take you down to the farm and to pick a room." Cora asks Fred "Are you out of your mind?" Fred ignores Cora, as Fred asks Myrtle "How's Sarah and Regina doing?" Cora tells her Brother In Law "Both living as sinners like their Mama. Queen Slut the first. The Caney family disgrace.." Myrtle warns Cora "If you don't shut your damn mouth, you'll be in here plugged to a machine. I'll even move back to play with the cord." Fred sighs "Let us go down to the farm, and you can get comfortable Myrtle." Cora asks Fred "Aren't you scared she will try and seduce you?" Myrtle and Fred heads out, as Cora shakes her head with disgust, as Fred tells the nurses "Tell my Zzie I'll be back for dinner." Fred and Myrtle heads to the Caney farm, at the Carroll County line.
It's evening, and at Betty Zane and Fred's farm, The Caney Farm, Myrtle and Fred sits in the kitchen, as Myrtle tells her Brother In Law "Don't tell Betty I cooked chicken." Fred tells Myrtle "She's happy you're here. The girls are too. And I won't say anything about your fine dinner." Myrtle whispers "I know she's health-conscious, but.." Fred stops Myrtle, and gently says "It's been lonely coming home each evening without her. But she'll be home soon and I know she will. She's tough." Myrtle nods "She certainly is." Myrtle tells Fred, changing subjects "The two of you did a great job on the home place. I even seen where Betty left all of our names in the wall in the sun room. From the Oldest, to me." Fred laughs "Even where you scratched over Cora's name also." Myrtle sighs "I can't stand her." Fred sighs "We try to love everybody, especially Z, she's always so outgoing." Myrtle tells Fred "The two of you did an excellent job raising your girls, and Mama and Daddy would have been proud of y'all. All these years in Kansas City, and coming down here, and the accent kicks back into high gear." Fred laughs, as he looks at the clock, and tells Myrtle "Our maid fixed your room up for you. We'll go see my Z in the morning." Myrtle heads to the guest room, as she sits on the edge of the bed, as she has flashbacks to her childhood, and sighs "It still feels like home."
The next day, Myrtle and Fred arrives at the Rehab Facility, as Cora waits outside Betty Zane's door, and snarks "So having an affair on my Sister are you Fred?" Fred warns Cora "I really think you need to stop with this. Myrtle's nothing like you say she is, and I think you need to leave." Cora snides "Well your Daughters aren't here." Fred responds "They work Cora." Myrtle adds "Don't you have an appointment at the makeup counter?" Cora snaps at Myrtle "Nobody wanted to see you return! You are nothing but an embarrassment to our family. Your two Daughters were nothing but sluts, and your Son, a worthless loser, and your Grandchildren..." Myrtle stops her Sister boldly, and yells "Shut your old decrepit-ed ass up. I've had enough." Myrtle pulls Cora's wig off, as Anna arrives, and Cora yells at Myrtle "Don't you dare." Myrtle takes Cora into an empty room, and locks the door, as Myrtle looks at Cora, and goes "Ok. Now I see why I stopped having perms. You are nothing but a holier than thou hypocrite that does nothing but judge others, and gets enjoyment from trying to control people's lives, and I won't watch you do that to Betty, or her family. You've worn out your welcome." Cora yells at her Sister "You have no room to talk. You got pregnant and wasn't married. You hurt our family." Myrtle bluntly reminds Cora "Mama and Daddy were good people, and once they met Jimmy, they adored him. He and Fred were friends, and even your dear Edgar liked him." Cora snaps "The hell he did." Myrtle asks "So since we're opening up Cora, why did you change your last name back to Caney?" Cora snaps "Because someone worthy needed to keep the family name alive. And I'm worthy! Why don't you go back to your house of sin Myrtle?" Myrtle tells her Oldest Sister "Edgar had enough and divorced you after 50 years, and your kids want nothing to do with you. I talk to Edie, and.." Cora snaps "Don't judge me!" Myrtle tells Cora "I'm stating mere facts, and the fact is, you like to preach, but you don't follow your sermons. You alienated your family, because you are nothing but a bitter old woman with nothing else to do. My life was never perfect, but I wouldn't change a damn thing. And maybe you should go look in the mirror, and let our Sister heal in peace. And here's your damn 5 dollar wig." Myrtle walks out of the room, as Cora fumes, and leaves the Rehab Facility, as Myrtle walks inside Betty Zane's room, as Betty Zane moves her left arm on her own, and her left foot, as Anna hugs her Father, and Myrtle starts to cry, as Betty Zane tells her Sister "Now stop that Myrtle." Anna starts to cry as well, as Betty Zane defiantly exclaims "The lord is healing me!" Myrtle smiles "The Caney fire still burns, and it's burning madly now." Betty Zane gently tells her Sister "All I needed was the Lord, and my family, and I'm going nowhere yet!" Betty Zane and Myrtle hugs, as Fred and Anna watches on, both crying tears of joy.
A week later, in South Kansas City, Myrtle returns home, as Sarah sits in the kitchen, as Myrtle walks into the kitchen, and tells her Daughter "I'm home." Sarah hugs her Mother, and ask "How's Aunt Betty?" Myrtle smiles, as she responds "She went back home yesterday, and walked out of the Rehab Facility, with a cane, but she's going to be just fine." Sarah laughs "I heard you let Aunt Cora have it while you were there." Myrtle laughs "Damn straight I did, and I finally made peace with everything. How were things here?" Sarah sighs "Actually smoothly, normal." Myrtle walks around the house, as she returns to the kitchen, and tells her Daughter "Well at least everything was where it was when I left." Sarah and Myrtle hug, as they celebrate Betty Zane's miraculous recovery from her stroke.
(Dedicated with love to Betty Zane Waters, and The Waters Family)
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
Life With Myrtle: Season One. Episode 5. Myrtle Faces The Past: Part One
At Myrtle's Home, Regina and Ted has left, as Sarah sits in the den with Myrtle, as Myrtle asks her Daughter "So when will we settle that bet?" Sarah responds "It looks like we both lost, so let's call it even Mama." Myrtle sighs "Yeah she lasted longer than a week, and Ted's been going down there all the time, or to his second home. It feels like normal around here." Sarah sighs with relief "It sure does Mama." Meanwhile there's a knock at the door, as Myrtle walks up into the living room, as she tells Sarah "I've been watching the movers. May be Alberta. Could be Mitzi." Myrtle opens the door, as her jaws drop, as her Sister, Betty Zane Waters stands at the door, and Myrtle stands in silence, as Sarah walks to the door, and asks her Mother "What's wrong Mama.." Sarah gets excited as Betty Zane looks at her Youngest Sister, and asks "Well Myrtle? Gonna let me in? I came all the way from Georgia." Myrtle hugs Betty Zane, the middle of Myrtle's three Sisters, as Myrtle tells her in shock "I'm just stunned you came up to Kansas City to see me Betty." Betty Zane jokes "Well honey, you've said for years you were coming home, but you haven't done it, so I felt it to surprise you and here I am!" Myrtle welcomes her Sister inside, as Sarah asks her Aunt "How's Uncle Fred doing?" Betty looks at her Niece, as she responds "He's well, be 90 next year. My wonderful Daughters thought it would be good if I took a vacation, and I chose Kansas City." Myrtle quips "As long as the wicked witch of the South still breathes, I won't be paying a visit anytime soon." Betty Zane sighs "Cora. Well Myrtle, don't you think it's time the two of you make peace?" Myrtle asks "Does she still think she's God's chosen saint?" Betty turns to Sarah, and asks "So I hear Billy's a Reverend?" Sarah re-corrects her Aunt "Priest Aunt Betty. He's serving overseas. Been doing it for years now." Betty Zane meanwhile looks at Myrtle, and asks "So where's Regina and the new Husband?" Myrtle responds "Likely doing something you don't want to know anything about." Sarah tells her Mother and Aunt "I think we should go out to lunch, my treat! I'll call Amelia and invite her also." Betty Zane asks Myrtle "Are you going to invite Regina?" Myrtle shakes her head, and tells her Sister "They can go rent a room in Grandview, and you stay here with me. I know how you are, and they would offend you." Betty Zane notices an empty beer can, and Myrtle motions to Sarah, as she quickly throws it away, and Myrtle sighs "I think you'll just sleep with me, like when we were younger. Otherwise all hell will break loose." Betty Zane sighs "So Regina's still herself?" Sarah and Myrtle both nods, as they all head off to Quivira Park Mall, located in Overland Park Kansas.
A hour later, Myrtle, Sarah, and Betty Zane returns to Myrtle's home, as they hear yelling inside the house, as Regina and Ted have returned, and Myrtle looks at her Daughter and Sister, and tells them "Stay out here and come in when it's quiet." Myrtle walks inside, where Ted yells at Regina in a drunken tone "I told you to quit that damn job Regina! NOW!" Regina yells back "And when in the hell will you find something to do besides sit on a damn bar stool Ted?" Myrtle yells at her Daughter and Son In Law "Shut the hell up both of you! We have a guest staying with us! I won't tolerate this while she's here do you read me?" Ted snarks at Myrtle "Well tell Regina to quit working at Pancake King, and we won't have this damn problem!" Myrtle asks Ted "And did you find a job yet? Considered being a beer taster in St.Louis?" Ted yells "A woman's place is in the home!" Outside, Betty Zane looks over to her Niece, as she tells Sarah in a gentle tone "You have done a great job with Amelia. She's a pleasure. Reminds me of my Granddaughter." Sarah tells her Aunt "Amelia reminds me so much of Jenny, and I really don't feel like her Grandma, but her Mother." Betty Zane sits in one of the rocking chairs, as she holds Sarah's hand, and tells her "You have always impressed me my sweet Sarah. You are so strong, and to go through what you did.." Sarah gets quiet, as she sighs "I miss her everyday. I took that girl home from Park Lane Hospital myself. She's a miracle." Betty Zane smiles "God gave you a reason to keep going Sarah. Amelia needed you." Back inside, Myrtle pulls Regina into the kitchen, as Ted yells "Come back here Regina! We're not through yet!" In the kitchen, Myrtle tells Regina "Betty Zane's here." Regina gasps "Aunt Betty?" Myrtle nods, and sternly warns Regina "Any shit from you or Ted, and I'll throw both of you the hell out of my house!" Regina looks at her Mother, and responds "Mama, Ted will straighten up. I love Aunt Betty." Sarah and Betty Zane walks inside, as Ted yells "And here's Sarah and someone I don't know! More moochers?" Betty Zane looks up, and sighs "Oh my stars." Sarah tells her Aunt "Meet Ted Jones, King wino of South Kansas City, and the top moocher in this house." Regina walks out of the kitchen, as Betty Zane goes "Regina!" Regina hugs her Aunt, and Ted yells "This woman's another relative?" Myrtle walks into the den, as Betty Zane whispers to her Nieces "Myrtle's still fiery I see." Regina and Sarah takes Betty Zane into the kitchen, as Myrtle grabs Ted's shirt, and bluntly tells him "Pack your things, and find another place to stay!" Ted responds "I'll go! And I won't come back." Myrtle sarcastically responds "Maybe The Veteran's Club has a room available!" Ted storms out, as Regina shakes her head, and Betty Zane asks Regina "So you're married again. I've lost count, how many times have you been married?" Regina sighs "Ten." Myrtle warns Regina "He comes here while Betty's here, there will be hell to pay." Betty Zane shakes her head, and sighs "Myrtle Caney Thomas, you are still a spitfire." Myrtle stares at Regina, and quips "I have to be with her around." Betty Zane rolls her eyes, as Regina keeps her composure, and Sarah watches closely, as afternoon turns into evening.
It's night-time, and in the den, Regina lays on the pull out bed, as Sarah sits up in the living room, as Regina tells her Sister "Well Ted's staying in Grandview until Aunt Betty leaves, and things are peaceful for once." Sarah quips "When Aunt Betty visits, she brings this positive aura with her." Regina looks at her Sister, and asks "So why can't we be close like Mama and Aunt Betty?" Sarah sighs "I don't know. But let's play pretend." Regina confides "Sarah, I'm glad Ted's staying in Grandview. He's really pushing his limits with me with the job." Sarah bluntly asks her Sister "Does Ted work?" Regina shakes her head, and Sarah responds sternly "Well Ted needs to shut his ass up, and you stand up for yourself for once Regina! I've been divorced for 20 years, and I have enjoyed being independent. If you tried it, you would like it. Life doesn't revolve around men, and there's few Daddies and Uncle Freds." Regina sighs 'But Sarah, I don't like being alone." Sarah reminds her Sister "You can put all the makeup on you want, color your hair, but you have children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, hell you're too old to be playing slut. Accept the fact you're old, and ain't a damn thing you can do about it. Embrace it." Sarah heads to her bedroom, as Regina tells her Sister "Sarah?" Sarah turns, and Regina tells her Sister "Don't use this against me, but I wish I was strong like you." Sarah looks at her Oldest Sister, and heads to bed. In Myrtle's bedroom, Myrtle and Betty Zane sleeps together, as Myrtle tells her Sister "It feels like when we were kids." Betty Zane smiles, and goes "It does. You should see the homeplace now Myrtle. Popper and I renovated it, and it's beautiful." Myrtle looks over at Betty Zane, and tells her "After Merle passed, it's now just you, me, and Cora left. And you know you and I got married the same year too." Betty Zane responds "This year will be 65 years." Myrtle sighs "I miss Jimmy so much. I know Mama and Daddy had problems he was 14 years older than me, but he was my shining light. I lay here at night, and I pretend he's here." Betty Zane holds Myrtle's hand, and gently responds "He's in heaven now Myrtle, and he went the way we all would like to go." Myrtle tells her Sister "It meant so much to me when you and Fred came up and stayed that week with me after he passed." Betty Zane looks at Myrtle, and tells her Youngest Sister "That's what Sisters do." Myrtle hugs Betty Zane, and they say a prayer, as they go to sleep.
It's one week later, and Betty Zane prepares to return home to Georgia, as Betty Zane asks Myrtle "So where's Regina?" Myrtle tells her Sister "Working. I think she's enjoying herself." Betty Zane gently tells Myrtle "I know you still have hard feelings about years ago, and you take it out on her. Maybe you need to grow close to her and let it go." Myrtle sighs "It's hard to do Betty. I wasn't blessed with three great Daughters like you were. I have a good Son I haven't seen in years, and Sarah." Betty compliments Myrtle, and reminds her "You and Regina try to grow closer. It isn't her fault Myrtle." Sarah meanwhile walks inside, and Betty Zane hugs her Niece, as she tells Sarah "You take good care of your Mama." Sarah tells her Aunt "You give everyone a big hug for me, and send my love, and have a safe flight." Myrtle asks Betty Zane "Want me to go with you to KCI?" Betty Zane tells her Sister "I remember the way to the airport Myrtle, and I think I'd feel safer driving myself. You get too angry on the road." Sarah laughs, as Myrtle quips "Aggression pays dividends in this town." Betty Zane responds "Well if you ever come visit, you'll be surprised how much Carrollton's grown." Myrtle laughs "When Cora's gone or placed in a nursing home, then maybe." Betty Zane hugs her Sister, and tells Myrtle "I love you." Myrtle responds "I love you too Betty. Be careful and call me when you get home." Betty Zane smiles, and tells Myrtle and Sarah "I will, and remember what I said." Myrtle nods, as Betty Zane pulls out of the driveway, and heads to the airport to return to Georgia. Myrtle stands on the porch, as Sarah stands next to her Mother, as Myrtle has a tear in her eye, and Sarah notices, and whispers "Do I see some emotion?" Myrtle sighs "Betty's a saint. Time's been good to her." Sarah tells her Mother "It's been good to you also Mama." Myrtle hugs her Daughter, as they walk back inside.
Three hours pass, as Regina has returned, and tells her Mother and Sister "Ted's on his way home." Sarah sighs "You didn't listen to a damn word I said did you Regina?" Regina responds "He'll have to accept that I'm working, and if he doesn't like it, then he can kiss my ass." Meanwhile Myrtle paces the kitchen, as she calls the airport in Atlanta, and responds "Thank you." and hangs up, as Myrtle walks back into the living room, as Myrtle quips "Betty's plane landed safely, and she promised to call me!" Sarah reminds her Mother "Traffic in Atlanta's worse than here in Kansas City." Myrtle responds "I wouldn't know because I haven't been to Georgia in 35 years." Suddenly, the phone rings, as Myrtle quickly answers, and goes "Betty Zane, I told you to call me as soon as....you.......landed....." Myrtle drops the phone, as Regina and Sarah looks at their Mother, as Myrtle stares at them, and Myrtle is speechless, and she looks at her Daughters, as Sarah picks up the phone, and speaks to her Cousin, and tells her "I will tell her." Sarah hangs up, as Myrtle looks at Sarah, and Regina, as she tells them with her voice trembling "Betty's had a stroke." Sarah and Regina comforts their Mother, as Myrtle cries "This can't be true. This just can't be true.."
(Dedicated with love to Betty Zane Waters, and the Waters family.)
A hour later, Myrtle, Sarah, and Betty Zane returns to Myrtle's home, as they hear yelling inside the house, as Regina and Ted have returned, and Myrtle looks at her Daughter and Sister, and tells them "Stay out here and come in when it's quiet." Myrtle walks inside, where Ted yells at Regina in a drunken tone "I told you to quit that damn job Regina! NOW!" Regina yells back "And when in the hell will you find something to do besides sit on a damn bar stool Ted?" Myrtle yells at her Daughter and Son In Law "Shut the hell up both of you! We have a guest staying with us! I won't tolerate this while she's here do you read me?" Ted snarks at Myrtle "Well tell Regina to quit working at Pancake King, and we won't have this damn problem!" Myrtle asks Ted "And did you find a job yet? Considered being a beer taster in St.Louis?" Ted yells "A woman's place is in the home!" Outside, Betty Zane looks over to her Niece, as she tells Sarah in a gentle tone "You have done a great job with Amelia. She's a pleasure. Reminds me of my Granddaughter." Sarah tells her Aunt "Amelia reminds me so much of Jenny, and I really don't feel like her Grandma, but her Mother." Betty Zane sits in one of the rocking chairs, as she holds Sarah's hand, and tells her "You have always impressed me my sweet Sarah. You are so strong, and to go through what you did.." Sarah gets quiet, as she sighs "I miss her everyday. I took that girl home from Park Lane Hospital myself. She's a miracle." Betty Zane smiles "God gave you a reason to keep going Sarah. Amelia needed you." Back inside, Myrtle pulls Regina into the kitchen, as Ted yells "Come back here Regina! We're not through yet!" In the kitchen, Myrtle tells Regina "Betty Zane's here." Regina gasps "Aunt Betty?" Myrtle nods, and sternly warns Regina "Any shit from you or Ted, and I'll throw both of you the hell out of my house!" Regina looks at her Mother, and responds "Mama, Ted will straighten up. I love Aunt Betty." Sarah and Betty Zane walks inside, as Ted yells "And here's Sarah and someone I don't know! More moochers?" Betty Zane looks up, and sighs "Oh my stars." Sarah tells her Aunt "Meet Ted Jones, King wino of South Kansas City, and the top moocher in this house." Regina walks out of the kitchen, as Betty Zane goes "Regina!" Regina hugs her Aunt, and Ted yells "This woman's another relative?" Myrtle walks into the den, as Betty Zane whispers to her Nieces "Myrtle's still fiery I see." Regina and Sarah takes Betty Zane into the kitchen, as Myrtle grabs Ted's shirt, and bluntly tells him "Pack your things, and find another place to stay!" Ted responds "I'll go! And I won't come back." Myrtle sarcastically responds "Maybe The Veteran's Club has a room available!" Ted storms out, as Regina shakes her head, and Betty Zane asks Regina "So you're married again. I've lost count, how many times have you been married?" Regina sighs "Ten." Myrtle warns Regina "He comes here while Betty's here, there will be hell to pay." Betty Zane shakes her head, and sighs "Myrtle Caney Thomas, you are still a spitfire." Myrtle stares at Regina, and quips "I have to be with her around." Betty Zane rolls her eyes, as Regina keeps her composure, and Sarah watches closely, as afternoon turns into evening.
It's night-time, and in the den, Regina lays on the pull out bed, as Sarah sits up in the living room, as Regina tells her Sister "Well Ted's staying in Grandview until Aunt Betty leaves, and things are peaceful for once." Sarah quips "When Aunt Betty visits, she brings this positive aura with her." Regina looks at her Sister, and asks "So why can't we be close like Mama and Aunt Betty?" Sarah sighs "I don't know. But let's play pretend." Regina confides "Sarah, I'm glad Ted's staying in Grandview. He's really pushing his limits with me with the job." Sarah bluntly asks her Sister "Does Ted work?" Regina shakes her head, and Sarah responds sternly "Well Ted needs to shut his ass up, and you stand up for yourself for once Regina! I've been divorced for 20 years, and I have enjoyed being independent. If you tried it, you would like it. Life doesn't revolve around men, and there's few Daddies and Uncle Freds." Regina sighs 'But Sarah, I don't like being alone." Sarah reminds her Sister "You can put all the makeup on you want, color your hair, but you have children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, hell you're too old to be playing slut. Accept the fact you're old, and ain't a damn thing you can do about it. Embrace it." Sarah heads to her bedroom, as Regina tells her Sister "Sarah?" Sarah turns, and Regina tells her Sister "Don't use this against me, but I wish I was strong like you." Sarah looks at her Oldest Sister, and heads to bed. In Myrtle's bedroom, Myrtle and Betty Zane sleeps together, as Myrtle tells her Sister "It feels like when we were kids." Betty Zane smiles, and goes "It does. You should see the homeplace now Myrtle. Popper and I renovated it, and it's beautiful." Myrtle looks over at Betty Zane, and tells her "After Merle passed, it's now just you, me, and Cora left. And you know you and I got married the same year too." Betty Zane responds "This year will be 65 years." Myrtle sighs "I miss Jimmy so much. I know Mama and Daddy had problems he was 14 years older than me, but he was my shining light. I lay here at night, and I pretend he's here." Betty Zane holds Myrtle's hand, and gently responds "He's in heaven now Myrtle, and he went the way we all would like to go." Myrtle tells her Sister "It meant so much to me when you and Fred came up and stayed that week with me after he passed." Betty Zane looks at Myrtle, and tells her Youngest Sister "That's what Sisters do." Myrtle hugs Betty Zane, and they say a prayer, as they go to sleep.
It's one week later, and Betty Zane prepares to return home to Georgia, as Betty Zane asks Myrtle "So where's Regina?" Myrtle tells her Sister "Working. I think she's enjoying herself." Betty Zane gently tells Myrtle "I know you still have hard feelings about years ago, and you take it out on her. Maybe you need to grow close to her and let it go." Myrtle sighs "It's hard to do Betty. I wasn't blessed with three great Daughters like you were. I have a good Son I haven't seen in years, and Sarah." Betty compliments Myrtle, and reminds her "You and Regina try to grow closer. It isn't her fault Myrtle." Sarah meanwhile walks inside, and Betty Zane hugs her Niece, as she tells Sarah "You take good care of your Mama." Sarah tells her Aunt "You give everyone a big hug for me, and send my love, and have a safe flight." Myrtle asks Betty Zane "Want me to go with you to KCI?" Betty Zane tells her Sister "I remember the way to the airport Myrtle, and I think I'd feel safer driving myself. You get too angry on the road." Sarah laughs, as Myrtle quips "Aggression pays dividends in this town." Betty Zane responds "Well if you ever come visit, you'll be surprised how much Carrollton's grown." Myrtle laughs "When Cora's gone or placed in a nursing home, then maybe." Betty Zane hugs her Sister, and tells Myrtle "I love you." Myrtle responds "I love you too Betty. Be careful and call me when you get home." Betty Zane smiles, and tells Myrtle and Sarah "I will, and remember what I said." Myrtle nods, as Betty Zane pulls out of the driveway, and heads to the airport to return to Georgia. Myrtle stands on the porch, as Sarah stands next to her Mother, as Myrtle has a tear in her eye, and Sarah notices, and whispers "Do I see some emotion?" Myrtle sighs "Betty's a saint. Time's been good to her." Sarah tells her Mother "It's been good to you also Mama." Myrtle hugs her Daughter, as they walk back inside.
Three hours pass, as Regina has returned, and tells her Mother and Sister "Ted's on his way home." Sarah sighs "You didn't listen to a damn word I said did you Regina?" Regina responds "He'll have to accept that I'm working, and if he doesn't like it, then he can kiss my ass." Meanwhile Myrtle paces the kitchen, as she calls the airport in Atlanta, and responds "Thank you." and hangs up, as Myrtle walks back into the living room, as Myrtle quips "Betty's plane landed safely, and she promised to call me!" Sarah reminds her Mother "Traffic in Atlanta's worse than here in Kansas City." Myrtle responds "I wouldn't know because I haven't been to Georgia in 35 years." Suddenly, the phone rings, as Myrtle quickly answers, and goes "Betty Zane, I told you to call me as soon as....you.......landed....." Myrtle drops the phone, as Regina and Sarah looks at their Mother, as Myrtle stares at them, and Myrtle is speechless, and she looks at her Daughters, as Sarah picks up the phone, and speaks to her Cousin, and tells her "I will tell her." Sarah hangs up, as Myrtle looks at Sarah, and Regina, as she tells them with her voice trembling "Betty's had a stroke." Sarah and Regina comforts their Mother, as Myrtle cries "This can't be true. This just can't be true.."
(Dedicated with love to Betty Zane Waters, and the Waters family.)
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Life With Myrtle: Season One. Episode 4. Regina Gets A Job
It's morning time at Myrtle's Home, as Myrtle sits on her porch, as Mitzi sits next to her, as they drink coffee, and go through their mail, as Myrtle tells Mitzi, holding two envelopes "Well it's time to go to the river." Mitzi goes through her mail, as she sighs "Bills Bills Bills." Myrtle quips "Yeah, mine have went to hell since Regina and Ted moved in here." Sarah pulls into the driveway, as Myrtle yells "Sarah!" Mitzi looks at Myrtle, as Sarah tells her Mother "Well Mama, I did what you asked, here it is." Sarah pulls an application out for Pancake King, as Myrtle asks her Daughter "Are they hiring?" Mitzi asks "Pancake King Myrtle? Regina?" Myrtle quips "She'd fit in well there, and out of my hair." Sarah quips "They're hiring, always open, and always hiring. It'd be perfect for Regina." Mitzi asks Myrtle and Sarah "Has she ever held a job before?" Myrtle laughs "Only in alimony Mitzi. All those divorces, money, and then broke, and marries again, one worse than the last." Sarah sarcastically answers "And now she can't do better than Ted." Myrtle quips "Age hasn't been kind to her, like it has to us." Regina meanwhile walks outside, as Mitzi tells Myrtle and Sarah "I'm going to cook Johnny breakfast before he goes to sleep for work tonight." Regina watches Mitzi, as she asks her Mother "So are all of you out here talking about me again Mama?" Myrtle holds up the electric bill, and asks her Oldest Daughter "Do you know what's in this?" Regina responds "A bill Mama?" Myrtle nods, and answers "Right. And do you know how much it is Regina?" Regina is silent as Myrtle yells "$500.00! You and that damn wino in there have sent my bills through the roof, and if you and Ted are going to stay here, you better get a damn job!" Regina looks over to Sarah, and asks "Well does Sarah pay rent?" Myrtle tells Regina "She does help me, unlike you. Every morning.." Regina sighs "I'm just a housewife that takes care of her Husband." Sarah looks away, as she laughs to herself, as Myrtle responds "You are a snake that's waiting on Mama to die because she thinks she's inheriting my home, and her parents money! And that's not the case!" Regina yells "Ted doesn't want me to work Mama!" Myrtle gets up, and boldly tells Regina "Ted Jones can go to hell and so can you!" Sarah hands the application to Regina, as Regina goes "Pancake King?" That diner at the state line?" Myrtle asks with a mischievous smile "Would you like to stay with Mommy?" Regina responds "We have nowhere else to go." Myrtle tells her Daughter "Under the overpass will be your next place if you don't get your ass moving." Regina whines, and Myrtle snaps "And since you're dressed, get down there now. I am going to start packing your things today." Regina huffs "Fine!", and heads to her car, as she sighs "Damn you Sarah." Regina pulls out of the driveway, as Myrtle looks at Sarah, and smiles, as Sarah asks her Mother "Are you hiding something from me?" Myrtle laughs "She doesn't know it, but Mitzi and I went down there already, and Regina's actually going in for training." Sarah walks inside, as she laughs, and Myrtle yells into the den, where Ted's asleep "Get up and go to your second home! You're too damn drunk to look at!" Ted wakes up slowly, as Myrtle picks up Ted's shirt and pants, and throws them to him, and walks with Sarah into the kitchen, as Myrtle quips "She's got night shift, and we have the house to ourselves."
As afternoon comes turns into evening, Myrtle and Sarah returns from the casino, as Regina asks her Mother and Sister "Where the hell have the two of you been?" Myrtle quips "Looking for husbands. We went to the river for a little while. Mama got her check." Sarah sighs "And the little shit wins again." Regina yawns "Ted's gone, and I have to head into work shortly. They work you to death at that sleaze pool." Myrtle goes "Pancake King's a great place. Jimmy and I went often, and when I walk through the door, all the waitresses come to my table and treat me like a Queen." Sarah tells her Sister sarcastically "And you'll meet men. This may be the first time in recorded history you're actually tired from standing up and moving around." Regina snaps "Don't start with me Sarah." Myrtle quips, as she heads into the kitchen "And while Regina's working, I'm having a party." Regina snaps "And you're raising hell about bills?" Myrtle walks over to the cabinet, as she pulls out some cigar boxes, and hands Sarah some money, and tells her "Get me some vodka. The good stuff." Regina snaps at her Mother "You are a damn hypocrite. You gripe about Teddy and I all the time, and tonight you're drinking?" Myrtle, pulling out cards, dice, and walking around the kitchen, mumbles "I know how to keep my legs shut when drinking. My mouth too." Regina snaps "You are really getting on my nerves. I could put you in a home you know?" Myrtle turns around, and tells Regina "And I could put you in a sanitarium. Now since you're in uniform, go on to work and leave me the hell alone." Regina asks "And what about Ted?" Myrtle laughs "I'll tell him where you are. Bye Regina." Regina storms out, as Myrtle walks over to the phone, and calls Mitzi, and Alberta, telling both "Tonight I'm having a party. Come over here. Regina has to work." Both agree, and a few minutes later, Sarah returns, as Myrtle tells her Daughter "It's going to be a great evening with what I have in mind." Sarah looks at her Mother, as she takes the vodka to the refrigerator, and reminds Sarah "I only drink at special occasions, and Regina working, means tonight I drink."
As night's fallen, at Pancake King, down the road at State Line and 435, Regina waits on a table, as she tells them "Welcome to Pancake King, want any appetizers?" Another table yells "Hey what about us?" Regina smiles, and snarls "In a minute!" The cook walks over, as he tells Regina "For a woman your age I'd think you'd know this trade from the looks of you." Regina snaps "And what the hell do you mean by that?" The cook laughs "You look like the Queen of the lizard people, and if you play right, you can make huge tips. Trust that." Regina tells the cook "Take care of these people and let me freshen my makeup." Regina runs to the bathroom, as a drunken Ted walks inside, and another waitress asks Ted "Ted Jones. The bar is full, want a table?" Ted, fuming slurs "I want to see my damn Wife!" Regina runs out of the bathroom, and her eyes widen, as Ted sits at a table and tells his Wife "You belong at home! Protecting me from your Mother and her crazy ass friends and your family." Regina asks "What do you mean?" At Myrtle's Home, the vodka bottle's being passed around, along with Orange Juice, as Myrtle, Sarah, Mitzi, Alberta, and Sarah's Granddaughter, Amelia sits at the kitchen table, as Amelia tells her Grandmother "I feel like I could be back with Ward Jr than being here." Myrtle tells her Great-Granddaughter, as she's got a buzz "We needed a DD for later." Alberta reminds Amelia as she too is buzzed "Ward Jr may be home, but your future Father In Law didn't want you there." Sarah, the only one besides her Granddaughter who's sober, as Mitzi yells "Let's all talk about sex!" Sarah looks over at Amelia, and says with relief "Sweetie. We have our hands full." Myrtle yells "Jimmy and I had sex every day, as soon as dinner was finished after the kids moved out. He was a good boy." Mitzi laughs "Boyd and loved to play in each room in the house after our kids grew up and moved out before Johnny moved in." Alberta quips with a grin "Got some before I came over, and he told Amelia to drive me here because..." Myrtle looks over at her Great-Granddaughter, and asks "So have you.." Amelia, embarrassed goes "Grandma!!" Alberta covers Amelia's mouth, and whispers "I know you and my Son have, but kept quiet." Sarah rolls her eyes at Amelia, as Sarah tells her Granddaughter "I just hope you are using protection. I'm not ready to be a Great-Grandma!" Myrtle yells "Me either." Mitzi slurs "You'd be a Great Great Grandmother.." Myrtle yells "I know Mitzi! And I am done sending money gifts and shit." Sarah looks around, as Myrtle, Mitzi, and Alberta finishes off the vodka, and Myrtle looks around, and tells everyone "Let's go spying." Alberta slurs "Regina and Pancake King? Damn I want to see that. Regina whatever the hell her last name, working." Mitzi sighs "I need to stock up on aspirin." Sarah has a look of dread, as does Amelia, as Sarah tells Amelia "You take Alberta, and I'll drive Mama and Aunt Mitzi." Myrtle, Mitzi, and Alberta heads outside, and Amelia tells Sarah "MaMa, I've never seen Aunt Mitzi drunk before, or Grandma and Alberta. They are crazy!" Sarah puts her hand on her Granddaughter's shoulder, and smiles "They are, and I'm not very crazy that you lied to me." Amelia responds "I've used protection." Sarah responds "Let's take care of the party, and we'll discuss this at a later time sweetie." Amelia and Alberta gets into Amelia's car, as Myrtle sits in her Buick, and Sarah tells her Mother "Move over!" Myrtle sighs "Damn I wanted to hot rod." Sarah pulls out of the driveway, and Amelia follows, as the caravan heads to Pancake King.
Back at Pancake King, the diner's full of patrons, as Ted sits at the bar, and yells at Regina, in a drunken tone "Hey I told you to go home!" Regina yells back at her Husband "If you want a damn home, drink that coffee and shut the hell up!" One patron yells at Regina "We don't come here for that!" Regina yells "I've had a damn enough of you too! Meanwhile in the parking lot, Sarah pulls up, as Myrtle and Mitzi sits in the back seat, as both of them are passed out, and Amelia pulls up besides her Grandmother, as Alberta's awake, and tells Amelia "Let's go inside." Sarah walks over, and sighs "Well it looks like two of the gang's out." Alberta looks inside Myrtle's Buick, and laughs, as she sobers "That was fun. I have no doubt the two of them had a great time." Sarah quips "No doubt they did. They look like little kids on a road trip." Alberta looks through the window at Pancake King, and sees Regina throwing a tantrum, as Ted yells, and Sarah sighs "Well I think I would have preferred staying home and listening to Mama talk about sex." Alberta laughs "I had fun, and we bought that house. Moving in in a few weeks." Alberta looks at Amelia, and tells her "Just take me through a drive thru, and take me home. I have seen enough..." Alberta, Sarah, and Amelia turn, as the manager pulls into the parking lot in a fury, and Sarah tells her Granddaughter "I'll visit you soon Amelia." Amelia sighs "And that talk." Sarah hugs her Granddaughter, and responds "I just want you to be careful." Amelia and Alberta leaves, as Alberta tells Amelia "Looks like someone's about to get fired." Sarah meanwhile drives her Mother and Mitzi back home, and Myrtle wakes, as she asks her Daughter "I thought we were going to see Regina?" Sarah responds "She had her hands full." Back at Pancake King, the manager walks inside, as she yells "Two damn cars just left and I think it's because of you Regina Jones!" Regina asks "Was it a Buick?" The manager looks over at Ted, and yells "And you can't be babysitting your Husband working in MY restaurant! You're fired!" Regina takes her apron off, and yells "And take this and stick it up your ass!" Regina and Ted leaves, as Regina tells her Husband "You can sleep on the floor!"
A week later, Regina sits in the den, as she drinks a beer, as it's morning, and Sarah walks down, and asks her Sister "So how's things going dear Sister? Enjoying your job?" Regina responds "Luckily Mama talked that bitch of a manager into keeping me on. Where is Mama?" Sarah responds "She and Mitzi went for their morning stroll at the mall." Ted walks into the den, as he's ready to go to the Veteran's Club, and asks his Wife "So are you going to quit?" Regina defiantly responds "No! I actually enjoy working there. I fit in, and made a few friends." Sarah asks "Male or Female?" Ted listens, as Regina responds "None of either of your's business!" Myrtle and Mitzi meanwhile walks inside, as they return home, and Myrtle tells Regina "Mama did you a favor this morning and stopped in at Pancake King, and heard such nice things. I'm impressed." Regina smiles for a moment, as Myrtle holds an envelope, and Regina asks her Mother "Is that the mail?" Myrtle responds "No Regina. It's your first check." Regina walks up into the living room, as she tells her Mother "So are you going to let me see it?" Myrtle puts the check in her purse, and quips "I had the manager sign it to me, and now I have bills to pay, but don't worry, breakfast's on me." Mitzi walks out of the kitchen, as she tells Sarah, Regina, and Ted "We got some pancakes." Regina rolls her eyes, as Myrtle smiles, and reminds Regina "If you want to stay with me, you have to pay." Myrtle looks at Ted, and tells him "Now it's your turn." Ted walks out, as he mumbles to himself, and Myrtle, Sarah, and Mitzi walks into the kitchen, as they have breakfast, as Regina sighs "I'm tired of pancakes."
As afternoon comes turns into evening, Myrtle and Sarah returns from the casino, as Regina asks her Mother and Sister "Where the hell have the two of you been?" Myrtle quips "Looking for husbands. We went to the river for a little while. Mama got her check." Sarah sighs "And the little shit wins again." Regina yawns "Ted's gone, and I have to head into work shortly. They work you to death at that sleaze pool." Myrtle goes "Pancake King's a great place. Jimmy and I went often, and when I walk through the door, all the waitresses come to my table and treat me like a Queen." Sarah tells her Sister sarcastically "And you'll meet men. This may be the first time in recorded history you're actually tired from standing up and moving around." Regina snaps "Don't start with me Sarah." Myrtle quips, as she heads into the kitchen "And while Regina's working, I'm having a party." Regina snaps "And you're raising hell about bills?" Myrtle walks over to the cabinet, as she pulls out some cigar boxes, and hands Sarah some money, and tells her "Get me some vodka. The good stuff." Regina snaps at her Mother "You are a damn hypocrite. You gripe about Teddy and I all the time, and tonight you're drinking?" Myrtle, pulling out cards, dice, and walking around the kitchen, mumbles "I know how to keep my legs shut when drinking. My mouth too." Regina snaps "You are really getting on my nerves. I could put you in a home you know?" Myrtle turns around, and tells Regina "And I could put you in a sanitarium. Now since you're in uniform, go on to work and leave me the hell alone." Regina asks "And what about Ted?" Myrtle laughs "I'll tell him where you are. Bye Regina." Regina storms out, as Myrtle walks over to the phone, and calls Mitzi, and Alberta, telling both "Tonight I'm having a party. Come over here. Regina has to work." Both agree, and a few minutes later, Sarah returns, as Myrtle tells her Daughter "It's going to be a great evening with what I have in mind." Sarah looks at her Mother, as she takes the vodka to the refrigerator, and reminds Sarah "I only drink at special occasions, and Regina working, means tonight I drink."
As night's fallen, at Pancake King, down the road at State Line and 435, Regina waits on a table, as she tells them "Welcome to Pancake King, want any appetizers?" Another table yells "Hey what about us?" Regina smiles, and snarls "In a minute!" The cook walks over, as he tells Regina "For a woman your age I'd think you'd know this trade from the looks of you." Regina snaps "And what the hell do you mean by that?" The cook laughs "You look like the Queen of the lizard people, and if you play right, you can make huge tips. Trust that." Regina tells the cook "Take care of these people and let me freshen my makeup." Regina runs to the bathroom, as a drunken Ted walks inside, and another waitress asks Ted "Ted Jones. The bar is full, want a table?" Ted, fuming slurs "I want to see my damn Wife!" Regina runs out of the bathroom, and her eyes widen, as Ted sits at a table and tells his Wife "You belong at home! Protecting me from your Mother and her crazy ass friends and your family." Regina asks "What do you mean?" At Myrtle's Home, the vodka bottle's being passed around, along with Orange Juice, as Myrtle, Sarah, Mitzi, Alberta, and Sarah's Granddaughter, Amelia sits at the kitchen table, as Amelia tells her Grandmother "I feel like I could be back with Ward Jr than being here." Myrtle tells her Great-Granddaughter, as she's got a buzz "We needed a DD for later." Alberta reminds Amelia as she too is buzzed "Ward Jr may be home, but your future Father In Law didn't want you there." Sarah, the only one besides her Granddaughter who's sober, as Mitzi yells "Let's all talk about sex!" Sarah looks over at Amelia, and says with relief "Sweetie. We have our hands full." Myrtle yells "Jimmy and I had sex every day, as soon as dinner was finished after the kids moved out. He was a good boy." Mitzi laughs "Boyd and loved to play in each room in the house after our kids grew up and moved out before Johnny moved in." Alberta quips with a grin "Got some before I came over, and he told Amelia to drive me here because..." Myrtle looks over at her Great-Granddaughter, and asks "So have you.." Amelia, embarrassed goes "Grandma!!" Alberta covers Amelia's mouth, and whispers "I know you and my Son have, but kept quiet." Sarah rolls her eyes at Amelia, as Sarah tells her Granddaughter "I just hope you are using protection. I'm not ready to be a Great-Grandma!" Myrtle yells "Me either." Mitzi slurs "You'd be a Great Great Grandmother.." Myrtle yells "I know Mitzi! And I am done sending money gifts and shit." Sarah looks around, as Myrtle, Mitzi, and Alberta finishes off the vodka, and Myrtle looks around, and tells everyone "Let's go spying." Alberta slurs "Regina and Pancake King? Damn I want to see that. Regina whatever the hell her last name, working." Mitzi sighs "I need to stock up on aspirin." Sarah has a look of dread, as does Amelia, as Sarah tells Amelia "You take Alberta, and I'll drive Mama and Aunt Mitzi." Myrtle, Mitzi, and Alberta heads outside, and Amelia tells Sarah "MaMa, I've never seen Aunt Mitzi drunk before, or Grandma and Alberta. They are crazy!" Sarah puts her hand on her Granddaughter's shoulder, and smiles "They are, and I'm not very crazy that you lied to me." Amelia responds "I've used protection." Sarah responds "Let's take care of the party, and we'll discuss this at a later time sweetie." Amelia and Alberta gets into Amelia's car, as Myrtle sits in her Buick, and Sarah tells her Mother "Move over!" Myrtle sighs "Damn I wanted to hot rod." Sarah pulls out of the driveway, and Amelia follows, as the caravan heads to Pancake King.
Back at Pancake King, the diner's full of patrons, as Ted sits at the bar, and yells at Regina, in a drunken tone "Hey I told you to go home!" Regina yells back at her Husband "If you want a damn home, drink that coffee and shut the hell up!" One patron yells at Regina "We don't come here for that!" Regina yells "I've had a damn enough of you too! Meanwhile in the parking lot, Sarah pulls up, as Myrtle and Mitzi sits in the back seat, as both of them are passed out, and Amelia pulls up besides her Grandmother, as Alberta's awake, and tells Amelia "Let's go inside." Sarah walks over, and sighs "Well it looks like two of the gang's out." Alberta looks inside Myrtle's Buick, and laughs, as she sobers "That was fun. I have no doubt the two of them had a great time." Sarah quips "No doubt they did. They look like little kids on a road trip." Alberta looks through the window at Pancake King, and sees Regina throwing a tantrum, as Ted yells, and Sarah sighs "Well I think I would have preferred staying home and listening to Mama talk about sex." Alberta laughs "I had fun, and we bought that house. Moving in in a few weeks." Alberta looks at Amelia, and tells her "Just take me through a drive thru, and take me home. I have seen enough..." Alberta, Sarah, and Amelia turn, as the manager pulls into the parking lot in a fury, and Sarah tells her Granddaughter "I'll visit you soon Amelia." Amelia sighs "And that talk." Sarah hugs her Granddaughter, and responds "I just want you to be careful." Amelia and Alberta leaves, as Alberta tells Amelia "Looks like someone's about to get fired." Sarah meanwhile drives her Mother and Mitzi back home, and Myrtle wakes, as she asks her Daughter "I thought we were going to see Regina?" Sarah responds "She had her hands full." Back at Pancake King, the manager walks inside, as she yells "Two damn cars just left and I think it's because of you Regina Jones!" Regina asks "Was it a Buick?" The manager looks over at Ted, and yells "And you can't be babysitting your Husband working in MY restaurant! You're fired!" Regina takes her apron off, and yells "And take this and stick it up your ass!" Regina and Ted leaves, as Regina tells her Husband "You can sleep on the floor!"
A week later, Regina sits in the den, as she drinks a beer, as it's morning, and Sarah walks down, and asks her Sister "So how's things going dear Sister? Enjoying your job?" Regina responds "Luckily Mama talked that bitch of a manager into keeping me on. Where is Mama?" Sarah responds "She and Mitzi went for their morning stroll at the mall." Ted walks into the den, as he's ready to go to the Veteran's Club, and asks his Wife "So are you going to quit?" Regina defiantly responds "No! I actually enjoy working there. I fit in, and made a few friends." Sarah asks "Male or Female?" Ted listens, as Regina responds "None of either of your's business!" Myrtle and Mitzi meanwhile walks inside, as they return home, and Myrtle tells Regina "Mama did you a favor this morning and stopped in at Pancake King, and heard such nice things. I'm impressed." Regina smiles for a moment, as Myrtle holds an envelope, and Regina asks her Mother "Is that the mail?" Myrtle responds "No Regina. It's your first check." Regina walks up into the living room, as she tells her Mother "So are you going to let me see it?" Myrtle puts the check in her purse, and quips "I had the manager sign it to me, and now I have bills to pay, but don't worry, breakfast's on me." Mitzi walks out of the kitchen, as she tells Sarah, Regina, and Ted "We got some pancakes." Regina rolls her eyes, as Myrtle smiles, and reminds Regina "If you want to stay with me, you have to pay." Myrtle looks at Ted, and tells him "Now it's your turn." Ted walks out, as he mumbles to himself, and Myrtle, Sarah, and Mitzi walks into the kitchen, as they have breakfast, as Regina sighs "I'm tired of pancakes."
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